You won't be disappointed!

Purely Joyful Movie!

Good concept, poorly executed.

The joyful confection is coated in a sparkly gloss, bright enough to gleam from the darkest, most cynical corners.

Lockjaw: Rise of the Kulev Serpent's photography is not so bad. That is hardly a consolation, as everything else is and that is an understatement in itself. Lockjaw: Rise of the Kulev Serpent has rather dull lighting and the scenery has little atmosphere or wonder, but they're nothing compared to the truly slipshod special effects. Audibly, it is little better, with a generic and overly-obvious music score and sound effects that manage to undermine the atmosphere, managing to make every bit of suspense or scare predictable instead, instead of adding to it. The dialogue is cheesy and stilted with nothing quotable, while the story is far too heavily padded out, has nothing surprising and brings forward no suspense or any real sense of horror. The snake is nowhere near menacing enough, is used poorly and has no personality, while the direction is at best flat and characterless. The characters are severely underdeveloped and are not likable in the slightest. On top of that, the acting is incredibly wooden from everybody involved, I know that they weren't helped by the writing and their characters but these actors looked as though they weren't even trying. All in all, Lockjaw: Rise of the Kulev Serpent is a terror of a movie and in a bad way. 1/10 Bethany Cox

As a child, Alan Cade steals a wooden voodoo box containing a magical pen that has the power to make whatever is drawn with it become a reality; years later, when a monster truck accidentally runs down his wife Becky, Alan uses the pen to summon a monster to seek revenge on the occupants of the vehicle, five friends partying at a nearby cabin.Lockjaw: Rise of the Kulev Serpent (AKA Carnivorous) is a derivative straight-to-DVD piece of garbage that rips off its basic revenge plot from enjoyable straight-to-video 80s horror Pumpkinhead. But where Pumpkinhead proved to be a fun creature-feature thanks to solid direction from FX legend Stan Winston, a very cool monster (also by Winston), and a decent performance from seasoned pro Lance Henrickson, Carnivorous simply elicits boredom and unintentional laughter in equal measures with its uninspired script, inexperienced cast, and truly crappy beast—an over-sized, poorly rendered CGI snake with an alligator's head.Opening with an embarrassingly naff credits sequence, complete with cheesy lightning effects and statues with glowing red eyes, Carnivorous does not bode well from the outset, and matters only get worse from thereon in: director Amir Valinia sets up the film's back-story in an awful prologue that displays a complete lack of talent from its child actors (while also showcasing a neat array of dollar store Halloween props), before cutting to the present day, where he introduces viewers to his equally untalented adult cast, a bunch of total unknowns who are likely to remain that way if this is the kind of bilge they choose to appear in.After some predictably dumb drunken shenanigans at the cabin, during which sexist jerk Kurt (Caleb Michaelson) gets a lap-dance from drunken big-breasted slapper Ashley (Victoria Vodar), Kurt's nice-girl girlfriend Sam (Lauren Fain) seeks comfort in the arms of good-guy Kelly (Wes Brown), and Ashley has sex with her boyfriend (but annoyingly keeps her bra on the whole time), the creature finally moves in for the kill. Several unimpressive death scenes later, ex-rapper DMX turns up with a rocket launcher and blows the 'snakigator' to kingdom come, finally putting an end to our suffering.

What a god awful waste of time and television broadcasting bandwidth. This movie is an IQ test . . . if you watch, you fail. I thought nothing could be worse than Bone Eater... I was wrong. Nothing could possibly be worse than Mutants... I stand corrected. There were so many things wrong with this movie, not the least of which was the acting, there's just everywhere to start, and nowhere to finish. I've seen more realistic responses from a corpse than those generated by the rejects performing in this piece of trash. Why would anyone in the movie-making business let their name be associated with this thing? Anyway, do yourself a favor, sidle up to a piece of metal and watch rust develop... you'll be far happier.

(aka DMX Carnivorous. That is actual title on version I saw) Kid steals a voodoo pen that will cause what ever is drawn with it to be destroyed by a giant alligator like serpent. years later the pen is used by a man to get revenge on the kids who ran over his wife. Only DMX as the son of the man who had the pen before it was stolen can save the kids. Very silly horror movie that is yet another CGI snake killing people film. Its also a poor rip off of Pumpkinhead and any number of other films you've seen. What can I say this isn't a good movie. the actors try but the monster stuff and the convulsions of the plot work against it. My reaction while watching this was why am I watching this? I didn't know. you know you're in trouble when an 80 minute film seems to be heavily padded. I'd take a pass and avoid this film.