Best movie of this year hands down!

Such a frustrating disappointment

The film may be flawed, but its message is not.

By the time the dramatic fireworks start popping off, each one feels earned.

I don't remember much from this movie as I saw it when I was a little kid with my dad. However, I do remember that some sort of monster that kind of is a cross between Chewbacca and Bigfoot comes out of people's closets and starts terrorizing a small town. It's really just a monster-on-the-loose movie but with very little plot.This little horror movie is camp at its best, ridiculous and cheesy. I recalled my dad saying that this movie was stupid throughout, but couldn't stop laughing at how bad it was.So, if you like camp and just plain, insane fun, go for it. Otherwise, stay away.Grade D+

This funny and sometimes charming slapstick parody of monster films and mockery of the old "monster in the closet" children's bedtime phobia features some interesting debut performances including, 6'5" Pittsburgh native, Kevin Peter Hall who starred as the original 'Predator', and pop singer, Stacey Ferguson (Fergie) as a child actor. Released by Troma Pictures, this little exercise in satirical humor never takes itself seriously even at its most violent (which isn't very intense anyway given its PG rating). A superman alter-ego-type named Clark is a journalist trying to uncover the mysterious "closet murders" in a small city by what appears to be a random rampaging beast of some sort that travels from closet to closet. Police and citizens are baffled until the monster shows itself, and that's when things really get silly. Clark teams up with a cute, conservative teacher (Denise DuBarry) and Sheriff (Claude Akins) to find a way to stop the snarling monstrosity (Kevin Peter Hall in a rubber suit). This also has some zany performances by Donald Moffet , John Carradine as a blind old man and Henry Gibson as an eccentric scientist. The final solution for this absurdity is a real hoot! "Destroy all closets!" Shot in 1983, but not released until 1987, anyone with even the slightest sense of humor will chuckle at this overlooked little flick.

Wow, I just saw this on T.V. as one of the "scary" movies they show around Halloween. Was this rated G? There wasn't really anything to make this movie scary, or worth watching. Also, other people say this is a spoof, but I don't think so. For a spoof, you need something called "humor". This low-budget crap-fest didn't have a shred of humor, and it didn't make much sense, either. You basically have a goofy looking monster (man in rubber suit) coming out of closets, killing people, I guess, since you never see the monster doing violence to anyone or any bloody aftermath. The spinning newspaper tells you that people were killed by the monster, so I guess that's good enough.The military tries feebly to kill the monster, which isn't much larger than a man. They have very bad aim. Then the military FLEES! Wow, did this movie make the U.S. military look pathetic or what? The monster, while hard to kill, doesn't do much besides shuffle around and roar. Oh, and occasionally a second head pops out of its mouth and shrieks. It was a slightly interesting, yet a total Alien ripoff.What was the deal with the scientist playing the Xylophone to attract the monster? It was hard to understand a lot of the dialog due to the poor sound quality. Also, why did the monster carry around the main wimpy guy for so long? Why didn't the monster go into the closet when it had a chance? Why do I insist on trying to make sense out of the senseless?

~Spoiler~ Monster in the Closet is another dumb horror/comedy that is neither funny nor scary. This one is from Troma, but it looks a little glossier than what the studio normally puts out. I say that because of the cast and the creature design. I've never heard of the leads, but some of the supporting cast are rather famous. Henry Gibson, Claude Akins, John Carradine, Donald Moffat, Paul Dooley, and Stella Stevens are some good character actors to have in a project like this. Also featured are a young Paul Walker and Stacy "Fergie" Ferguson. I bet they don't even remember this one, and wouldn't admit to it if they did. Kevin Peter Hall (Predator) is playing the titular closet monster. The plot is simple: The monster comes out of the closet and kills people and nothing or no one can stop it. There are many attempts at humor, but most of it is just boring. It all ends in a silly finale where the world has to destroy their closets. The movie was apparently filmed in 1983 but didn't get released until 1987. I wonder why?