Yawn. Poorly Filmed Snooze Fest.

Exactly the movie you think it is, but not the movie you want it to be.

The joyful confection is coated in a sparkly gloss, bright enough to gleam from the darkest, most cynical corners.

All of these films share one commonality, that being a kind of emotional center that humanizes a cast of monsters.

B movie from Universal starring Ricardo Cortez as a US Postal Inspector fighting to keep the mail safe and on time for all of us. But none of you are going to watch this for Cortez. I would bet my stamp collection everyone who sees this today does so because it features horror legend Bela Lugosi as the villain. Bela plays a nightclub owner who resorts to robbing a mail truck to pay off his debts. Ricardo will have none of that. Too bad Bela didn't know the USPS motto: "Neither snow nor rain nor Hungarian thespians will stay these couriers from their appointed rounds." An enjoyable little programmer with some interesting "window into the times" elements. I liked seeing how the postal inspector's office worked, taking complaints about various cons, including showing a couple of gadgets that were used to fleece people. Also seeing planes, radios, etc. in older films always pleases me. I like the simple things. Sue me. Cortez is good. Lugosi is fun playing a different kind of character than I'm used to seeing him as. He's a criminal but a nervous, frightened one. Patricia Ellis has a rather risqué scene where we can see her body thru a shower door. Surprised that made it past the censors. Hattie McDaniel has a couple of funny lines. Some songs are shoved in because why not. Written by the author of "They Shoot Horses, Don't They?" Not kidding.

I doubt that any movie ever made better use of stock footage of floods than "Postal Inspector." Every time the tale sags -- or more accurately sogs -- it's back to some unfortunate town where the river is rising, the dam done burst, homes are being washed away and people are trudging through muck and mire (not to be confused with the vaudeville act of the same name,) trying to escape the deluge. The big chase scene even replaces cars and horses with speedboats. The plot centers on Bela Lugosi as a night club owner, drowning in debt, who tries to steal $3 million in old bills being transported by the US Post Office. Fortunately, Ricardo Cortez is there to sink him, aided by Patricia Ellis as a night club singer who manages to warble a few Frank Loesser tunes before the water rises. It's actually not a bad little thriller and manages to float along in a fast-moving 58 minutes.

This was long thought to be a lost film, but it has been resurrected using a number of different prints so quality varies, but entertainment is still consistent. This is an odd film being a mixture of genres namely thriller,disaster, musical and quasi-documentary about the post office. A number of crimes involving the post office are shown mainly tragic, but a couple are very funny. Eventually it centres on a train robbery of old banknotes en route to the federal mint. Ricardo Cortez is all suave self assurance as the leading detective assigned to the case, while Patricia Ellis is drop dead gorgeous as a chanteuse who may be involved with the robbery. Bela Lugosi as a club owner with links to a gambling syndicate only has a small role. Last part of the film takes place in a flood with stock footage lifted from the Johnstown flood interspersed with new studio shot scenes which blend quite well. Some may dislike the jingoistic tone of the film regarding the post office, but the movie fairly zips along and the denouement is exciting.

***SPOILERS*** Strange movie, even for one with Bela Lugosi in it,thats a combination of a crime/drama & musical/comedy with a bit of a disaster movie thrown in for good measures. Ricardo Cortez plays Gung-Ho Postal Inspector Bill Davis who's so off-the-wall that in one of the scenes that he's in he jumps from something like a 100 foot plank, minus his well-pressed suit, into the flooded streets below. In doing that Davis risks a broken neck in order to save a postal crook who was no more then a few yards away from a police speed-boat that was just about to rescue and arrest him anyway, without Inspector Davis foolishly risking his life. There's a number of songs sung in the movie by nightclub singer Connie Larrimore, Patricia Ellis, and a duet at the end of the film with Connie and her fiancé and brother of Postal Inspector Davis Charlie, Michael Loring, who's also a Federal Treasury Agent. The "Golden Eagle" nightclub owner Greg Benez, Bela Lugosi, is in big trouble with the local mob loan shark when he gets a telegram that another nightclub owner, Fred Commings owner of the Jack-O'-Lantern, was gunned down for not paying back his load from the mob. Benez is out $50,000.00 to the mob and is two weeks behind in his payments. "Golden Eagle" singer Connie Larrimore talking to both Postal Inspector and Federal Agent Bill & Charlie Davis get some inside information from big-mouth Charlie that he's going to send through the US mail $3,000,000.00 of used ten dollar bills to the Washington D.C Treasuary Dept. The bills are to be put out of circulation by having them incinerated. Later Connie talking to her boss Mr.Benez unwittingly tells him about the cash transaction through the local mail and Benez sees an out in getting the money that he owes the mob as well as pocketing the rest, $2.950 Million, for himself. The Benez gang steals Charlies car and uses it to corrals and rob the mail truck with the 3 million dollars in cash going back to the Treasuary Department and also shoots and kills the driver. This all happens as the town of Yarborough, where the movie takes place, is being flooded by a heavy downpour with the local river overflowing its banks. When the police and Postal Inspector Davis find the car belonging to Charlie at the crime scene they feel that he committed the crime but his brother Bill gives him two hours to come up with who really did it feeling that he's innocent. Later Benez and his gang kidnap both Charlie and his girlfriend Connie who went to Benez's place in order to find out who in the club took Charlie's car. This later leads to the exciting final speed-boat chase scene through the flooded streets of Yarborough with Charlie & Connie ramming a platform from where Benez and his hoods are trying to escape from the police knocking them all down and into the floodwater's below. Bela Lugosi is very subdued and, uncharacteristically, dull as the nightclub owner and mobster Greg Benez and has a supporting, but not his usual leading, role in the film. Which didn't give him that much screen time to really do "His Thing".Both Patricia Ellis and Michael Loring were adequate as the singer and Fed Agent, as well as lovers, in the movie but Ricardo Cortez was really over-the-top as Postal Inspector Bill Davis. Davis spouting platitudes about the wonderful US Post Office in almost every scene he's in that you for a moment thought you were watching a commercial for the USPS. Even though he tried to play his part as seriously as possible Inspector Davis did have a very strange sense of humor in the film. Postal Inspector Davis almost hanged and electrocuted, this was supposed to be his idea of comedy relief, a fellow postal worker in his office with gadgets that were illegally sent through the US Mail.Inspector Davis also seemed to be more worried about the mail of the Yarborough Post Office getting soaked by the raging floodwater's engulfing the town then he was worried about the lives and safety of the postal workers working there.