Too much of everything

I don't have all the words right now but this film is a work of art.

hyped garbage

The story, direction, characters, and writing/dialogue is akin to taking a tranquilizer shot to the neck, but everything else was so well done.

Unbelievable. Witless, coarse, crude, offensive, horrendously directed... This was produced by Samuel Goldwyn Jr. His father had been one of the two 'classiest' producers in old Hollywood; he not only made many superb dramas -- "prestige pictures", they used to call the type of dramas he'd make -- he also made excellent comedies, and he'd hired the very best writers and directors (Billy Wilder, George S. Kaufman, Howard Hawks. etc.) to make them. He must have turned over in his grave to see his name connected with this garbage.The director has zero idea of how to make a scene 'cook', to develop chemistry between his actors, to bring out whatever humor there might be in a situation... nothing. He seems to have spent most of his career grinding out sitcom episodes -- second-rate ones, at that -- which is a very different thing than doing what Hawks or Wilder or McCarey did. The climactic chase is embarrassing even by boneheaded-'80's-comedy standards. This seems to be his only feature-directing credit, and you can see why.Re the cast, Jim Carrey does the best he can, but he is obviously hamstrung by a director who told him to just do the script as written, like television -- and the script as written was just awful. Cleavon Little is wasted. The only saving grace is Lauren Hutton, who is sexy as hell and seems to be having a good time despite everything. It's also fun as a time capsule of its era -- the clothes, the music, etc. But outside of that and Lauren Hutton, it's an utter stinkeroo.

Jim Carey is at the height of his comedic powers in this truly delightful romp. With hilarious support from Cleavon Little (his best work since Blazing Saddles) and a surprising effective Lauren Hutton, Carey's encounters with a beautiful, seductive vampire are downright sidesplitting. Directed quite creatively by someone who understands comedy, Howard Shore, and written by an inspired David Hines, there is never a dull moment (nor a serious one) as this movie moves along at a breakneck pace. The lovely and talented Karen Kopins holds her own in this superb cast and delivers one of the funniest performances of her career in the role of Carey's virginic girlfriend. Special mention should be made of the hip musical score and the imaginative set design as well. All in all, this rates as one of Jim Carey's best films and one that will tickle the funny bone of general audiences as well as fans.

About the most interesting thing one can say about this movie is that it is a very early movie in the career of Jim Carrey. Other than that there is really nothing all that special about this movie which is not all that bad, just not all that good. The funniest scene in the entire movie for me focused more on the guys playing Jim Carrey's buddies in a very funny shower scene. Other than that most of the jokes are typical and you also have a dance scene that is very painful to watch. The story has an old vampire lady who must feast upon the blood of a virgin to keep her youthful appearance. Apparently, this is a very hard task to do in California (actually I am betting it is very easy, but they are probably saying it is hard as some sort of joke about the sexual promiscuity of those who live in the state). Well the vampires underlings find Jim and figure they have hit the jackpot so goes his slow transition to being a vampire. Like I said I liked some stuff in the movie, other parts I did not care for all that much. The friend's scene hilarious, but most of the jokes only garner a slight chuckle at best. Thankfully Jim Carrey was not based on the merits of this movie alone because he is not even the strongest actor in it. Worth a look, but not worth to many looks afterwards.

Once Bitten is set in mid 80's Los Angeles where a 400 year old Vampire Countess (Lauren Hutton) needs to drink the blood of a virgin three times before Halloween to keep her young looks, unfortunately for the Countess there aren't many virgins about & Halloween is a mere 10 days away... Teenage high school student Mark Kendall (Jim Carrey) is becoming frustrated with his girlfriend Robin (Karen Kopins) who refuses to have sexual relations with him, while everyone else around him seems to be at it like rabbits poor old Mark remains a virgin. With this in mind Mark & two of his friends Russ (Skip Lackey) & Jamie (Thomas Ballatore) decide to visit a seedy bar to try & pick up girls, Mark catches the attention of the Countess who takes him back to her place where she drinks his blood. Mark suddenly starts to develop strange characteristics, he wears sunglasses, sleeps during the day in a box, has a taste for raw meat & begins to dress in black. The Countess needs to drink Marks blood two more times but she finds it difficult as Robin notices the changes in Mark & sets out to protect him before he to is turned into a Vampire for good...Directed by Howard Storm Once Bitten didn't really work for me. The script by David Hines, Jeffrey Hause & Jonathan Roberts tries to be a gentle horror comedy but in my opinion it falls pretty short on both counts. For a start the humour just isn't funny, the gay servant to the Countess who is as camp as he is embarrassing to watch, a scene when Mark accidentally drinks a glass of blood or a fancy dress party sequence when everyone keeps telling him he has a great Vampire outfit on to which he keeps saying he isn't wearing a costume, the character's aren't funny, the dialogue isn't funny, the situations aren't funny & the story itself isn't funny which is a very bad thing when Once Bitten is far more comedy driven than horror. There is only one even half way funny scene, it's when Marks two friends try to check his thigh for a Vampire bite in the school showers & everyone thinks they're all gay, yes that's really as funny as it gets folks. So the comedy side of things fails miserably what about the horror? Well don't expect the film to improve in this aspect either as there's a bit of blood drinking & Mark is chased through the Countesses house at the end by lots of Vampires but there's no blood or gore in it at all. Having said that I thought it told a reasonably decent story, it moved along at a fair pace & was sort of watchable in a silly, innocent kind of way.Director Storm doesn't do much to liven things up, Once Bitten isn't much to look at to be honest & it has no real style or visual flair. The film is neither funny nor scary so Storm fails in everything he set the film out to be. Forget about any blood or gore as there isn't any.With a supposed budget of about $3,200,000 Once Bitten is competent & it's well made, that's about the best thing I can say about it. I must admit the production design was quite nice especially the Countesses mansion which looked rather tasty & stylish, I wouldn't mind living there myself. Once Bitten was the first major role for Carrey, he does OK but you wouldn't have guessed from this that he would go on to become one of Hollywood's biggest earners. Hutton didn't do much for me as the Vampire, I just didn't think she was good looking enough & Cleavon Little as Sebastian her servant was awful.Once Bitten may hold a certain curiosity value for being Jim Carrey's first film but that's no real reason to watch it. I found it all very flat, unfunny & uninspired. Fails in to many departments for me, watch only if desperate.