Sorry, this movie sucks

It's simply great fun, a winsome film and an occasionally over-the-top luxury fantasy that never flags.

It's the kind of movie you'll want to see a second time with someone who hasn't seen it yet, to remember what it was like to watch it for the first time.

This is a dark and sometimes deeply uncomfortable drama

Oh, dear, I had some big hopes for this flick. For starters, it's written by Danny King, who was responsible for the witty Wild Bill (worth a watch) and directed by Jason Flemyng, who I've admired as an actor since his chilling lead role in George Romero's Bruiser. I thought that if somebody could add a new take on the vampyre mythos then these could be the two to do it... I have to admit they did try... but failed miserably.So what's so bad? It's full of great actors? It's the entire concept which bothered me. Vampire Overlords gathering together at a local farmhouse to discuss territory and quotas... so much for all-powerful beings who need to be feared. These are the most boring undead I've ever witnessed. It wouldn't have been too bad but both King and Flemyng spend too much time on this opening scene and idea. Even when things could have raised the action up a notch, like finding out one of them was taking more than their share, it's handled in a dull and tiresome way.Then when the army arrives, under the command of the church, I began to get my hopes up. Though Flemyng does a wonderful job of filming, adding interesting camera shots and angles - he's even pretty good with the action and fight scenes, he's not too good at creating atmosphere and this only adds to the sense of tedium. When the action finally heats up we are given a new vision of vampires. Not as all-powerful but as quite weak and powerless individuals. If you're wanting gore then there's very little in the film. In fact, the most blood in this film is in the farmer's fridge... along with loads of body parts... Sounds interesting, doesn't it(?) However, the farmer is just another wasted opportunity.Another thing that's wasted is the opportunities for comedy. The scene where Alice (Crosbie) wobbles out on a zimmer frame to take on the soldiers offers a lot of possibilities for both verbal and sight gags. However, what we get is a week killing and a cut away to another scene, only to later return to find Alice has been slain.And this is another letdown of the film. There are too many cut-aways. I don't mind when a director uses this as a way to cut down on gore. When handled correctly this style of filmmaking forces the audience to use their imagination, which usually is better than the filmmaker can provide. However, Flemyng doesn't just cut at gore and this gives the film a disjointed feel. The above scene, I mentioned, left me feeling unsatisfied.It's the actors that add the power and interest to the film. Even though their characters are lacking in appeal and are two-dimensional in structure they do breath a spark into them. It's just a shame that we don't get more of the Farmer, Mr Thatcher as I think Fletcher does a brilliant job with him. Eve Myles tries to Vamp it up as Vanessa but doesn't quite come across sexy enough - close though. Then you have the likes of Tony Curran as Boniface, Mackenzie Cook as Larousse, and Annette Crosbie as Alice... all of which are underused.So what we have is a nicely directed and well acted mostly dull and boring story. The entire thing would do well with a complete overhaul. The idea is strong and sound it just needed handling better, especially with the horror and comedic elements.I wouldn't recommend this to anyone who likes vampires or horror movies to rush out and grab a copy. Wait for it to come onto telly... and then, only if there's nothing else worth watching.

A gathering of a vampire council at a hidden hideaway turns into a bloodbath when the British Army ambushes them in an attempt to put an end to their local reign of terror in the new horror comedy, Eat Locals.Charlie Cox (Marvel's Daredevil) headlines a group of eight vampires who at their semi-centennial meeting discuss matters such as territory and new members. Their meeting also introduces the fanged ones to the human at the table. Billy Cook plays Sebastian, a warm blooded human who tags along with date Vanessa (Eve Myles) unaware his date is a vampire and she is accompanying him to a flock of bloodsuckers. Sebastian quickly realizes that he is not in friendly quarters but any notion of escape is thwarted when the army erupts in gunfire. Soon, the houseguests are accepting that they are surrounded by a heavily armed force lead by a commander committed to ending the vampire race.Vampire films have been done to nausea over the past two decades, but thanks to a tongue-in-cheek deviously funny script by Danny King (Wild Bill, 2011), Eat Locals felt like fresh fun covering familiar territory. There may not be laugh out loud moments, but the script is nuanced and seasoned with fresh characters, fun challenges and a satisfying ended that make the viewing worth recommending.It's hard not to root for the sharp-tooth characters as they struggle to find continued cause in their existence while fighting for their very survival. Added to the comedic mix are two additional human characters (Dexter Fletcher and Ruth Jones) that have a peculiar role in context of the vampires meeting above them in the house. Not all your favorite characters will survive but everyone seems to meet their maker after a spotlight moment which will leave audiences satisfied.We would categorize Eat Locals as more of a comedy than a horror. So too must have the director Jason Flemying who makes his directorial debut here after over 125 acting credits on IMDb.com. The director's end credits reel reintroduces each character with each actor looking like they are having a ruckus of a good time during the shoot.But don't think for a second that there isn't a good body count to go with all the yuks. Whether it's elderly vampire Alice (Annette Crosbie who has some of the better comedic moments) standing in the open firing off hundreds of rounds with an automatic weapon likely larger than her own physical frame or a concerned military man who gets rewarded for his kindness with two sharp objects impaling either side of his neck, Eat Locals brings body bags.By the time the lights again illuminated the theatre at the screening as part of the Toronto After Dark Film Festival, I was thankful for the experience. What a great treat right before the Halloween season.

We thoroughly enjoyed this film. Perfect viewing when you've had a busy day at the office and you need something easy to take your mind off things & just relax. We were really impressed with the actor who plays the unsuspecting male lead who is drawn into the vampires' lair. Other highlights were the ever-brilliant Dexter Fletcher and Annette Crosby (Mrs Meldrew!!) as an OAP-vampire- vigilante!! We took a punt and watched it with no preconceptions about what we were about to see, glass of wine in hand, ready to be entertained, which we were. So refreshing to see something that a) doesn't feature superheroes and b) doesn't involve an American male single-handedly saving the world. Again.

Terrible script. Awfully written dialogue & the actors do their best with what they've been given but it's obvious throughout that the cast had marvellous fun making the film & because it shows on screen, it's also still very enjoyable to watch, regardless. Not a classic & nor is it great, but it's a light-hearted, cheesy movie that doesn't take itself too seriously so I'd still recommend people see it, just for the few laughs it provides.