ridiculous rating

Memorable, crazy movie

If you don't like this, we can't be friends.

The movie's neither hopeful in contrived ways, nor hopeless in different contrived ways. Somehow it manages to be wonderful

30 minutes into 'Cops and Robbersons' I found myself clawing at the sides of my seat cushion. An hour into it I found myself with my head down tugging at my hair and groaning loudly. This sounds a bit childish so I will elaborate. 'Cops and Robbersons' is a terribly unfunny movie made by talented people who have made excellent films and stars actors who have made me laugh in the past so it is frustrating when I see them entrenched in a laughless screenplay. When a good actor takes a bad screenplay you can always sense their talent trying to get out.The screenwriters have assembled a comic formula out of the nuts and bolts of other movies and tried to fasten them together to make a funny movie. This never works because 'Cops and Robbersons' is a movie pitch, not a movie itself. It's the beginning of an idea that doesn't need fine tuning so much as it needs a complete overhaul.The movie takes The Robbersons, an ordinary Ozzie and Harriet family and puts as its head Norman Robberson (Chevy Chase) a man who is obsessed with cop shows. The dilemma is that a mobster (Robert Davi) has moved in next door and the authorities want to use the Robbersons' home to stake them out. Leading the stakeout is a rough-hewn cop (Jack Palance) who rolls his own cigarettes and always seems to have one planted in his leathery mug. Saddle that with a nagging wife, a daughter who develops an unconvincing romance with the mobster's son and a 5-year old who plays vampire and bites Palance on the neck.These are nuts and bolts not inspiration. They are the stuff of bad sitcom writing – the kind of writing that gets a show cancelled. When I see a movie like this that is directed at a sitcom loving audience I always marvel at how much less funny it sounds without a laugh track.Now onto the cast starting with Chevy Chase. My favorite Chase comedies are the ones that allow him to be a smart-ass mostly because he can do it without sounding like a bore. I've seen it in 'Spies Like Us' and 'Funny Farm' and the 'Fletch' pictures and a little in the first 'Vacation' movie. But here he's an annoying dope who is always in the way and just bumbles around reminding me that his Gerald Ford routine was funnier when he did it in a five minute sketch on 'Saturday Night Live'.Jack Palance surprised me in 'City Slickers' by taking his usual tough ol' buzzard persona and injecting it with humanity, warmth and truth. Here he's the same crusty old guy but the warmth and truth are gone because the movie doesn't have time between painful slapstick.Diane Weist has done her best work for Woody Allen. So, I try to measure Diane Weist's characters thusly: Would the character she's playing be convincing if she were playing it in a Woody Allen movie, in most cases yes. So, she's playing a good (albiet underwritten) character here in the wrong movie. There is one rather serious moment when she talks to Palance about his smoking that I thought was the movie's only ray of sunshine.I don't know what dragged director Michael Ritchie into this film after directing Chase in 'Fletch' and directing the marvelous (and somewhat similar) 'The Positively True Adventures of the Alleged Texas Cheerleader Murdering Mom'.By the way, you will note that I have avoided describing any of the specific scenes. That's because I just feel that this talented cast has had enough.

"Cops and Robbersons" is a pleasant enough comedy with Chase playing a Clark Griswold-type character. I found the movie funny and charming. But the movie doesn't seem to take its story very seriously. For example, Chevy Chase goes next door to "use the bathroom". Of course, he's really there to snoop. This, of course, I expected. In a movie about a stakeout, especially in a comedy, I expected a lot more to happen. Chase goes through the guy's wallet (why exactly, I do not know), ruins his mattress (again, I do not know), then merely gets caught. But this guy (Osborn) doesn't seem particularly suspicious. Then chase tries to roll his cigarette, which apparently, is supposed to be funnier than it is. Is this the best the filmmakers could come up with? And I though Jack Palance was wasted in a thankless role as a cop who mostly smokes, and makes small talk. And it's never explained why we don't see much of his partner. As for the ending, it doesn't quite take off, probably because it takes Chase forever to come crashing in. But still, I enjoyed the movie because it is entertaining.*** out of ****

I watched the movie on Comedy Central. Where was the comedy? Maybe it's because the movie is a total joke. But not a funny one. There is plenty of talent in this movie, but it is totally wasted. I didn't laugh once. I wasn't even slightly amused. The writer should have been charged, rather than paid. Most of the characters aren't believable. The actors must have been truly desperate to do this major embarrassment. You're better off seeing "Leonard, Part 6" instead. Life is too short to waste it on this sort of thing.

Dumb film with nothing creative nor comedic from mismatched stars Chase and Palance.