Just perfect...

It's easily one of the freshest, sharpest and most enjoyable films of this year.

There is, somehow, an interesting story here, as well as some good acting. There are also some good scenes

All of these films share one commonality, that being a kind of emotional center that humanizes a cast of monsters.

Rene Cardona, Jnr doing what he does best, though not with his usual flair nor the abundant cast normally assembled for these Latin B-grade horror fests. This one is just a re-hash of Hitchcock's "The Birds", featuring Michelle Johnson and Chris Atkins ("The Blue Lagoon") as a pair of reporters documenting the strange and sudden phenomenon gripping the world as birds of all species retaliate against mankind's sustained mistreatment.If you've ever wondered what a stray beak could do to your eye, you won't have to wait long watching this film to find out. And it's not pretty. But, aside from a brief moment or two of hysteria, "Beaks" is otherwise tame and unremarkable, a very loose narrative of clichéd story strands with little to elevate the pulse. Looks like it was shot on video or possibly made-for-TV, the production values and staging look confined, and the overall result is somewhat tedious.Aldo Sambrell features in a relatively interesting minor role as a farmer who warns of the impending danger from his personal experience whilst names like Gabriele Tinti, Sonia Infante and May Heatherly should be familiar to some audiences. For their part, Johnson and Atkins look comfortable and display apparent chemistry, then of course the title stars look more harassed than harassing, but it's difficult either way to make a pigeon look menacing. Birds on a budget isn't awful, but it's definitely not among the finest in Cardona's catalogue.

Broadcast journalist Michelle Johnson (as Vanessa Cartwright) and cameraman Christopher Atkins (as Peter) stumble upon the story of the century - BIRDS, formerly our feathered friends, have taken a foul turn! They are attacking people all over the world! The cute shirt-shedding blonde couple track the mostly pesky pigeons as they make mince meat out of people's faces. As the attacks increase, you get less of Ms. Johnson and Mr. Atkins showing their chests, and more pigeon poking.A real trouper, Mr. Atkins manages to utter the line, "We're sitting ducks," with a straight face."I know what we saw was awful, but it's over," says Salvador Pineda when he thinks he's escaped from danger. Not so fast. That could be your reaction after seeing this Rene Cardona Jr. homage to Alfred Hitchcock's "The Birds" (1963). There are some promising scenes, but the pace and editing are astonishingly bad - perhaps no editing was done, and Mr. Cardona tried to make a movie with the footage he had. And, it looks like they used up a lot of pigeons during production.** Beaks (10/87) Rene Cardona Jr. ~ Michelle Johnson, Christopher Atkins, Sonia Infante, Salvador Pineda

"Alfred Hitchcock's classic film … but with loads & loads of additional gore" … See, even the text on the old VHS box warned me that watching "Evil Birds" would be a complete waste of time, and still I didn't listen! There's gore, all right, but this also happens to be one of the most retarded movies I've ever seen in my life. We all know Hichcock and his films were (and still are) imitated and copied endlessly, but this is undoubtedly the most shameless and blatant rip-off of his repertoire ever! The story lines are identical, only the elaboration here is hopelessly inane with miserable dubbing, pitiable dialogs, atrocious acting performances (cursed be that gay boy from "The Blue Lagoon") and lousily cheap and unconvincing make up effects. Since there isn't the slightest bit of suspense or atmosphere to experience, "Evil Birds" is unspeakably boring and thus doesn't even qualify as 'entertainingly awful'. The bird attacks are wannabe engrossing, but it simply isn't very petrifying to see a pigeon/dove/chicken approach the camera bit by bit. I guess it requires a talented filmmaker in the league of Hitchcock to make even the most nonthreatening little animal look threatening. Writer/director René Cordona Jr. is getting dangerously close to becoming my personal choice of worst director of all time. This is the fifth major disappointment in a row I see of him (after "Cyclone", "Night of a 1.000 Cats", "The Bermuda Triangle" and "Tintorera!") and easily the most embarrassing of them all. So far, I only enjoyed his jungle adventure knock-off "Treasure of the Amazon".

These include:1.) Bad dubbing and phonetically challenged foreign actors.2.) A TV news story entitled "Attack of the Killer Chickens!"3.) Close-ups of birds pecking faces apart and pulling out eyeballs, leaving only blood-squirting empty black sockets.4.) Gratuitous slow-mo flying and attack scenes.5.) A dense globe-trotting blonde couple who take time out from the carnage for a PG-rated bubblebath/champagne kissy kissy session.6.) Snappy dialogue reducing a worldwide epidemic of bird attacks to "feathered mutiny."7.) An annoying little brat who runs outside during the middle of a bird ambush just to get her greedy little hands on a party horn...leading to several unnecessary deaths.8.) Christopher Atkins talking to his penis.In case you haven't caught on, this is a low-grade rip off of the 1963 classic which cuts back and forth, from different countries to different people running away from someone offscreen throwing pigeons at them. American actors Michelle Johnson and Atkins are in the main segment about TV reporters who travel around investigating various attacks only to get ravaged on a train, but the story also covers a bickering couple, their two kids and a girl in a bikini attacked at a beach and people at a children's birthday party (there's even a little Veronica Cartwright knock-off named Cathy!).This film was also released as BIRDS OF PREY and was an international production that was filmed in Spain, Peru, Italy, Mexico, Morocco and Puerto Rico!Score: 3 out of 10 (for scattered laughs)