How sad is this?

An Exercise In Nonsense

A great movie, one of the best of this year. There was a bit of confusion at one point in the plot, but nothing serious.

Great example of an old-fashioned, pure-at-heart escapist event movie that doesn't pretend to be anything that it's not and has boat loads of fun being its own ludicrous self.

I do not understand why anybody would want to make this movie. I just don't. I clearly don't understand why the distributors decided to released this movie. Of course, there is such a thing as debauchery in the movies. But after seeing Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters, I had my doubts. This is not a criticism. It is a considerable warning.For those who don't know the story by now, about 7 years in 2007, there was a hoax going on in the city of Boston. Residents were noticing small neon lit pictures of one of the characters from the late night TV show, Aqua Teen Hunger Force. Some of the residents were frightened because they thought it was a bomb. People in and around Boston were terrified. After the debacle, news reporters stated that the creators of the show did this hoax. It was not a laughing matter. In the case of the movie, it was also not at all, an laughing matter.The LED placards were used as a guerrilla marketing advertising campaign for the movie. Who in the world thought this was a great idea? Haven't the creators of the show realized the amount of trouble they gotten into? I bet they didn't because to be honest with you, I would sure like to know. As for the movie, it isn't even entertaining let alone the controversy. The plot of the movie is very pointless since we follow the main characters of the show, Meatwad, Master Shake and Frylock through a very bizarre odyssey as they escaped from Egypt and stumbled into uninteresting and very unfunny characters. The story of the movie isn't at all well-written as it weave completely in and out of the movie. By the end of the movie, I couldn't care less what happened to the Aqua Teens or any of the other supporting characters.I have seen the TV show myself. In fact, I have always enjoyed the TV show whenever it comes on television on Adult Swim, which the opposite program block that airs right after Cartoon Network is done airing its daytime cartoon shows for kids. The show does involves some of the oddest and mostly absurd humor I have every seen in adult animation. The humor varies from slapstick to sometimes scatological to gags. But compared to the movie, that's not saying a whole lot.Watching this movie was indeed an unpleasant experience. I have never felt more angry and furious during the entire watching of this feature. If they are going to write a feature-length movie about these characters, I would clean up the script first of all, and then come up with a brilliant idea that can be enjoyable. Maybe have the Aqua Teens be in a situation where they are endangered. The opening introduction involves an parody in which they make fun of the refreshment counter advertisements that was big in the 1950's through the 1970's. I don't know why the makers did this. Maybe they thought that it was funny to satirizes the refreshment counter ads. But, even that didn't cheer me up. I can't help it to say that it is the worst film of 2007. No doubt about that. There's no getting around a year where they were other bad movies to put on my worst 10 list. But Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters is very high on my list. It definitely deserved to be number one on my worst 10 list of 2007. Maybe I would probably stick with the TV series.It's movies like Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters are the reasons why very bad movies should be cut up and used as ukulele picks. Zero Stars.

Seeing the Aqua Teens movie at the local art-house theater, with a crowd of rowdy college students, was one of the top movie-going experiences of my life. The movie has been criticized for being nothing but a 90-minute episode. This is true, but that's exactly what I wanted. The Aqua Teens defy analysis, theirs is a world of the bizarre and the macabre, and to see their crazy world in feature-length, on the silver screen, was all you could hope for. The movie's plot, and I use the term lightly, follows the Aqua Teens as they try to discover their secret past. It proposes answers to many of the series' lingering questions: why was Abe Lincoln sending the Teens to the Moon? How is Dr. Weird connected to the Teens? How did they come into being, and why? I didn't believe any of the answers they gave, and I'm fine with that. It's wall-to-wall with humor of the most non-sequitur kind, there's no rhyme or reasons behind any of it, which is exactly what makes it so damn hilarious. The villain uses a giant exercise machine in his evil plans. Neil Peart, esteemed rock drummer, joins a miniature watermelon on the adventure. Meatwad's concert involves exploding kittens. Bruce Campell lends his voice as a talking Chicken McNugget. To have seen it in the theater was to go on something of a magic ride. The best line must be a tie between "We know you're invisible" and "Oh my god... where did you get that lollipop?" To any fan of the cult television series, it's worth a look, for anyone else, maybe avoid it, start with a Season One DVD and work your way down the spiral staircase slowly.

CONTAINS SPOILERSBased on the original reviews of this film, I was expecting extreme randomness and the essence of simply four episodes strung together. That's not what it was at all. The entire show was quite coherent throughout, although I will concede only if you had the mental makeup to appreciate absurdity as a vehicle for comedy.One of the characteristics about great sci-fi is the ability to take complex social issues, apply them to a different world altogether taking any personal biasness out of the equation, then re-examine the problem in a way that simplifies the problems and makes more sense out of them. This wasn't great sci-fi, but it did include this characteristic and was Douglas Adams-esqe in it's capacity to think completely outside of the box.The movie features the Aqua Teen Hunger Force. They are unique in appearance and therefore stuck together with a familial relationship. Frylock is the logical and responsible one, Master Shake is abrasive and aggressive yet lacking common sense or intelligence (very much like a teenager who thinks jackass is brilliant programming and deems himself intelligent for knowing good TV when he sees it) and Meatwad, who is naive and irresponsible, but otherwise good hearted and just along for the ride. They know not where they come from, but are making the most of life in New Jersey and have a nextdoor neighbor who is a Ron Jeremy wannabe named "Carl" (who also owns a pool which makes him 'better' than most). For those that deem themselves of higher intelligence, you should at least be able to appreciate the manner in which characteristics of the stupid are brought out to play in this world. The rest of the cast are very lifelike in the fact that the less intelligent they are the more aggressive and greedier they are. The Moonites are two dimensional and resemble atari figures and have lame 70's technology to match, yet are full of smack talk. I knew a 5'4" drummer just like this. The Plutonians consist of Oglethorp, who is also quite dumb but yet has an apparent leadership role, and his compatriot Emory. Emory is obviously more "with it" yet he just goes along with the ride much like the employees in "The Office". Finally there is the Cybernetic Ghost of Christmas Past, who comes onto the scene as one of great capability including the apparent ability to look into the past, present and future. Although he speaks authoritavely and confidently as one with this knowledge, in truth he knows as little as everyone else and just likes talking. He is the great uncle you try and avoid at reunions. "A thousand years ago I ran for treasurer of the student council..." I'm still laughing at that.The team tries to put together a piece of exercise equipment (ne'er an easy thing to do) even though they are warned not to, which leads to the potential destruction of mankind to the tune of a one-line techno song, which I found extremely poetic (the manner in which it moved was likewise hilarious). All of this perpetrated by a talking watermelon slice who is lucky enough to have Neil Peart, the drummer for the greatest rock group on Earth, to have as a compatriot. Is it as funny as the "Knights Who Say Ni"? I certainly think so. Admittedly, Walter's rational for creation was a little lame, but one could say it gives tribute to those who wonder if life on Earth was created simply to provide entertainment to our creators. Another brilliant aspect of the show was the timing. Space Ghost C2C (which many of the ATHF producers worked on before this) was brilliant for it's pauses...something ludicrous and somewhat inane would be said and there would oftentimes be a pause as everyone stood perfectly still with perhaps a blinking or two before any kind of response. The ATHF movie introduces another dimension of this...Character 1 would say something inane (often times the hilarious Cybernetic Ghost of Christmas Past), then there would be a humorous pause, then a 2nd character would reply in an attempt to make sense of what Character 1 said and instead of a return pause, Character 1 would answer immediately and crisply although even more inane in order to support the first statement.Finally, a note about the beginning. After the beginning musical sequences, there is a story set in New York thousands of years ago at 3 PM in 1492 which appears to take place in Egypt. Many are confused by this, but you should know this not part of the greater plot. It is simply Master Shake telling a story. He is not a procurator of the Truth, nor is he intelligent, but he tries to make up for it in aggressiveness and stubbornness. Therefore, everything is made up on the go and loosely strung together. What follows is the opening theme of the movie, THEN the actual movie begins.In short, this movie is not stupid. In fact, this movie patronizes the irresponsibility, greediness and shortsightedness of the majority in today's world. Shake, Meatwad and most of the minor characters will rely on Frylock only to the extent they get what they want, then once again cast reason aside until the next "high". Shake even goes so far as to shoot Meatwad in the head while clowning around and not considering anything about the consequences of his actions. Once again, it is the Wise to the rescue in the form of the Professor (Mr. Peart). Never once do Shake, Meatwad or Oglethorp give credence to other's ability but instead try to take credit for the work of others. Inane? Yes. Absurd? Definitely. But stupid? I don't think so.

The Cartoon Network series goes to the big screen-or in this case the DVD. Its a strange rambling tale about the groups origins and he quest to stop the Insano-flex exercise machine from destroying the world. Rambling wildly from thing to thing in a logic that can only be described as ADD inspired, this is actually a funny movie. Yes, I who can't watch the the TV show for more than five minutes, has found this foul mouthed expansion of the series quite funny and clever. To be certain its not for all tastes since its the sort of thing that makes off beat seem common place, but for those with a slightly skewed sense of humor this movie is a funny romp. I don't know what else to say beyond that. If you have any interest in the series give this a try, its so scattershot odds are you'll find something to laugh at.