Simple and well acted, it has tension enough to knot the stomach.

Pretty good movie overall. First half was nothing special but it got better as it went along.

The film never slows down or bores, plunging from one harrowing sequence to the next.

Through painfully honest and emotional moments, the movie becomes irresistibly relatable

It is hard to put into words just where this movie failed. But one overshadowing fact does come to mind; it was witless alright.The comedy in this 2008 movie was just about fully absent, and what little comedy that was to be found throughout the course of this movie was just about as witless as the movie itself was.I can't claim to enjoy Larry the Cable Guy's comedy, and why he is making movies is just beyond my comprehension. Ivana Milicevic was the one who carried the movie and made it any close to being bearable suffering through this train-wreck of a movie. And how they managed to get Joe Mantegna and Peter Stomare to appear in this movie was just an impressive feat in itself.I suppose that you have to be a fan of Larry the Cable Guy to enjoy this movie in any way.A witless hour and a half that deserves a two out of ten stars only given the production value of the movie. The rest of the movie just came and left without a single laugh. This was a wide swing and an even wider miss by director Charles Robert Carner.

OK, rag on me if you want to but WITLESS PROTECTION is funnier than HEALTH INSPECTOR and DELTA FARCE. I'm not a big fan of Larry The Cable Guy but I do occasionally find myself laughing at his off color, backwoods redneck jokes. Though I do believe that out of all the "Blue Collar Comedy Tour" comedians that Ron White is the funniest hands down. Anyway, Larry stars in this movie as a small town sheriff trying to make it big. Like FBI big. While hanging out at the local diner where his old lady works (Jenny McCarthy), Larry witnesses 4 ominous looking men dressed in black enter the diner with a blonde bombshell in tow (Ivana Milicevec). Larry, thinking that they have kidnapped the lady, follows them to the local gas station, causes a diversion and snatches the lady away from her entourage of kidnappers. But these men in black are actually FBI agents transporting the lady to Chicago, Illinois where she is the key witness in a big corruption case (think Enron). After awhile though, Larry thinks that these fellars are up to no good and actually want to do harm to the lady and not protect her. So Larry, using his small town Sheriff's intuition, decides that he will deliver the lady to Chicago himself. And mayhem ensues upon the way.OK, I will admit that there are jokes in here that I disliked in Health Inspector. Those being fart jokes. But damn, I found myself laughing more than I ever thought possible over a Larry The Cable Guy movie. One thing that I didn't quite understand was the scene where Larry's blows up his vehicle trying to make it out that the lady died in the fire. Anyway, it goes right from that scene to a scene where she is at the funeral home, in the casket, and the bad guys show up and Larry tells them that she is dead and they just accept it. Now, I really don't think that the lady's body would go right from the scene of the accident to the funeral home, all ready for public viewing. But, being that it is a Larry The Cable Guy movie, I guess I should just throw all logic right out the window. Better than Health Inspector? Yes. Better than Delta Farce? Yes. A great movie? No. But there are worse ways you could pass an hour and a half of your life.

Oh, man did I get done watching "Witless Protection" and let me tell you what, it's a piece of crap! I don't understand why Larry The Cable Guy continues to make crappy movies that nobody cares to watch unless you're a redneck or a total idiot. God, helps us if you're up there not playing poker.I don't know where to begin.Basically in "Witless Protection" Larry the Cable Guy plays a law enforcer wannabe who's seen too many programs of "Cops" and other police shows in thinking he can be a law enforcer in which he's nothing but one big joke to the community. He ends up kidnapping a foreign babe who's an actual witness and not someone kidnapped.Larry The Cable Guy is not even cool enough to have his own sitcom or even start his pathetic movie line up of films from "Health Inspector" to "Delta Farce" and they failed more times than films that became cult classics. This film nor will any film featuring Larry the Cable Guy in live action movies will ever be classics, even when he's dead, they'll be burning in the bonfires.The Good: Nothing! The OK: Jenny McCarthy's hot body.The Not: EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS FILM SUCKS!!! Overall, I have better movies to watch. This wasn't even my fault in watching this movie, it was my dad's fault and he even fell asleep where I just walked away and did something else.

This really is an OK movie. Only the most uptight of folks would find this that awful. The Good - Jenny, Ivana, Larry, stereotypes, mindless fun, witless conversation, Mississippi scenes (kinda looked like Illinois to me though), multiple mammary closeups, ....The Bad - Jenny, Ivana, Larry, stereotypes, mindless fun, witless conversation, Mississippi scenes (kinda looked like Illinois to me though), multiple mammary closeups, ....Simple stupid entertainment. As for my vote, well it was like deciding the presidential vote. We deserve better, but Obama(Ivana), Hilliary (Larry), and John (Jenni) are higher than ones, but not even close to tens, So I guess I will have to give them 5's and flip a 3 sided coin in the booth. Likewise, witless is worth probably less than a 5, but the predominate vote of 1 forces my rating of 10, at least as idiotic as the many who rated it a one.Whats a Southern boy to do?