Simply A Masterpiece

If the ambition is to provide two hours of instantly forgettable, popcorn-munching escapism, it succeeds.

A great movie, one of the best of this year. There was a bit of confusion at one point in the plot, but nothing serious.

Very good movie overall, highly recommended. Most of the negative reviews don't have any merit and are all pollitically based. Give this movie a chance at least, and it might give you a different perspective.

They drink, they dance, they drink some more. They romance some, then drink. It's highball after horse's neck after the ship's best Irish. Then, they drink. Captain Walter Connelly already seems like he's had a few shooters when he accuses assistant Leon Errol of being drunk. Who should come aboard ship but silent screen has-been, playing, guess what, a disillusioned journalist on a seemingly endless bender. When meddlesome nouvo riche Alison Skipworth shows up at the captains it table and proceeds to rearrange the seating, more drinks flow, simply to make her somewhat tolerable. By the time this cruise is only half way done, the ensemble of this pre- code comedy will have more booze in them than a hillbilly's still.There are far too many characters and story lines going on to sustain interest in this poverty row attempt to emulate MGM's "Grand Hotel" and "Dinner at Eight". At the time, Columbia wasn't among the five majors, but it's obvious from this, that they were working on increasing that number. In its 90 minute length, it focuses on the fight over stolen bonds, the revelation over the secrets of a married woman with a past, attempted suicide and a revolution in a third world country. And that's not between drinks, but during them.Among the ensemble are Victor MacLaglen, Helen Vinson, Wynne Gibson and Fred Keating. Character performers Donald Meek and Walter Catlett offer some amusement. There are some very clever lines, and Connelly is hysterically funny as the cynical title character. But when a film has this much going on, it should come with character cards to describe who is who and how they are involved in the story. And considering how much booze flows, a wine list wouldn't be bad, either.

Captain Hates the Sea, The (1934) ** (out of 4)Disappointing comedy has pretty much been forgotten by everyone except for die-hard film buffs who will probably remember the film not for its quality but due to it running over budget thanks in large part to a cast full of drunks who spent more time drinking than actually acting. The GRAND HOTEL type story takes place on a ship where we get several small stories including a P.I. (Victor McLaglen) tracking some stolen bonds, a writer (John Gilbert) suffering from alcoholism and of course a Captain (Walter Connally) who is constantly making the life of his steward (Leon Errol) a mess. For a comedy this thing really lacks any laughs and perhaps the funniest quote took place off the film. If legend is true, Columbia president Harry Cohn telegraphed director Milestone saying, 'Return to studio. The cost is staggering.' The director would reply, "So is the cast!" Who knows if that's the truth or not but it's certainly funnier than anything else in this film, which is a shame because we're given a very talented cast and most turn in fine performances but in the end there's just not much anyone could do with this screenplay. Considering the troubled production, who knows if there was more to this story that hit the cutting room floor but we're left with a pretty big mess. It seems that the film struggles to connect all the stories but that doesn't matter too much because none of them are overly interesting. I'd say the most interesting one deals with Gilbert but at the same time you have to question why he was given this part. Well, considering John Barrymore was a major alcoholic and ended up spoofing it in his later films I guess you can see why director Milestone would want Gilbert for this role. He certainly looks in pretty rough shape and appears to have aged fifteen-years from what he looked like in a few of his earlier talkies but at the same time he's certainly giving it his all and actually manages to turn in a memorable performance, which would be his last. McLaglen will put a smile on your face in a few of the scenes as will Errol who is constantly getting into trouble. Alison Skipworth, Donald Meeks, Wayne Gibson, Fred Keating and Helen Vinson are some of the supporting performers and they too deliver fine work. The Three Stooges appear as band members but the studio gives them very little to do. In the end, this is a real disappointment considering the talent involved but I'm sure film buffs will get some mild entertainment out of seeing all these familiar faces in one place.

Lewis Milestone, ace director-for-hire, seems to have been having a terrible year in 1934: between the fascinating train wreck of HALLELUJAH I'M A BUM and this one, he seems to have, temporarily at least, lost his way.Anyway, this picture is another fascinating failure because while there are many wonderful performers and performances in it -- Jack Gilbert, who would die shortly, was not the only actor whose career was on the slide and thus available on the cheap: Victor McLaglen and Wynne Gibson undoubtedly did not command as much money as they would have a few years earlier. Everyone gives fine performances, but they never quite come together as a whole, the way GRAND HOTEL does with its sense of fatality. THE CAPTAIN HATES THE SEA remains a series of vignettes linked by location. Perhaps too much landed on the cutting room floor.Others have commented on Gilbert, so let me note one of my favorite talents behind the camera: Joseph August. In a third of a century as a director of photography, from William Hart westerns in the 'Teens through PORTRAIT OF JENNIE, he showed you beauty with every shot, and never -- or rarely -- so that you noticed the work that went into it. His traveling shots moved only to tell a story, his compositions focused your attention where it should be, his lighting let you see peoples' faces -- take a look at the Three Stooges, away from the flat light that they worked in for all their shorts. They are suddenly human beings for their few scenes here -- and August was one of the masters of framing. If you have the patience for a second viewing, notice how windows, plants, people, every detail changes the effective shape of the frame, often to superb psychological purpose.To sum up, this movie as a whole does not work -- normally I would rate it a five out of ten, as another mediocre, derivative work. But the talent on display makes it substantially better than average.

A sort of B version of Grand Hotel but on a cruise ship, The Captain Hates the Sea is fascinating for a couple of terrific performances among the wreckage of this film that seems badly directed because of the confusing plot.A disparate group of people take a cruise and get involved in the petty squabbles of the crew as well as each other's messy lives. There's something about bonds and bad reputations and undercover cops but none of it makes much sense.However, John Gilbert, in his final film, is magnificent as the drunk. His voice has never been better and how ironic that this great star, whose career was supposedly ruined by his lousy speaking voice, turns in yet another terrific performance in a talkie. For anyone who has seen Gilbert in this film or Downstairs, Queen Christina, or The Phantom of Paris, you know that Gilbert had no voice problems.Here is suave and cool and funny in a William Powell sort of way, and he's just mesmerizing to watch. Also very good are Alison Skipworth as the bossy hostess, Helen Vinson as the bonds thief, Walter Connolly as the captain, Walter Catlett as the bartender, Donald Meek as the bearded passenger, Wynne Gibson as the woman with the past, Leon Errol as the ship's mate, Akim Tamriroff as the troubled man, and the Three Stooges as the ship's musicians.Victor McLaglen and Fred Keating are also after the bonds while John Wray is defending his wife's honor. Claude Gillingwater and Emily Fitzroy are also along for the ride. Quite the cast.Not a great film but certainly worth a look for the cast and for the superb John Gilbert.