Suppose They Gave a War and Nobody Came?
Suppose They Gave a War and Nobody Came?
PG | 11 September 1970 (USA)
Suppose They Gave a War and Nobody Came? Trailers

War is brewing between the soldiers at an otherwise quiet army base and the civilians of a nearby Southern town. Brian Keith is an officer who tries to keep the peace. However, peace is hard to come by with Ernest Borgnine as a stereotypical dumb hick sheriff who's quick to call in the local militia. Tony Curtis plays a skirt-chasing sergeant who can't stay out of trouble and soon lands in jail. Brian Keith borrows a tank to release his friend from jail. Things get more chaotic after that.

Reviews
StunnaKrypto

Self-important, over-dramatic, uninspired.

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Dotbankey

A lot of fun.

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Billie Morin

This movie feels like it was made purely to piss off people who want good shows

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Nayan Gough

A great movie, one of the best of this year. There was a bit of confusion at one point in the plot, but nothing serious.

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SimonJack

Over the years, Hollywood has made some very good comedies about the military or set in military service. But, this is not one of them. It has to be near the bottom of the heap. What there is of a plot seems to be a few days in the lives of three career GI buddies, who are together again in a stateside base around 1970. That's when the movie was made, and when the U.S. was in the height of the war in Vietnam. Other reviewers have noted the absence of any awareness of a war going on among the characters of this film. One of the three leads in this film, Sergeant Shannon Gambroni, is a major foul-up. None of the roles are very good, so Tony Curtis can't be blamed too much for his poor portrayal of an unbelievable character. Oh, we had people like Gambroni in the Army, but they never made sergeant – or, if they did, they didn't keep their stripes very long. This isn't a satire, and it's not a slapstick comedy. There is little more than a few clichés for humorous lines – nothing really witty about the film. The climax is the theft of some kind of a vehicle they call a tank. The feuding between the military and the local sheriff just doesn't come off as genuine, or comic. It reminded me of another film, the 1984 movie 'Tank" that starred James Garner. It wasn't a comedy, but had the best tank chase ever put on film. By the end of that movie, everyone was rooting for Garner and his tank. So, in scratching "Suppose They Gave a War and Nobody Came," I can recommend a number of very funny and very good military comedies. Before and during WW II, But Abbott and Lou Costello donned various service uniforms for some laughs. Other actors got in the act, parodying military life. In 1958, Andy Griffith and Nick Adams starred in "No Time for Sergeants," and introduced foul balls who couldn't do anything right. Two Navy comedies were made about service in the backwaters during the war. "Mr. Roberts" in 1955 starred Henry Fonda, James Cagney and Jack Lemmon. Cary Grant and Tony Curtis starred in the 1959 Navy comedy, "Operation Petticoat."Well into the Cold War, and U.S. involvement in Vietnam, American comedies about the military took on a different look. The slapstick and buffoonery were mostly replaced by satire and military irreverence. This led to some excellent films. "Dr. Strangelove," in 1964 starred Peter Sellers and a stellar cast. "MASH" in 1970 mixed the satire with drama and some crazy antics in a look back on the Korean War (then called a "conflict"). It starred Donald Sutherland and Elliott Gould. "Kelly's Heroes" in 1970 had GIs in WW II going after gold in a German bank. The leaders were Clint Eastwood, Telly Savalas, Don Rickles and Donald Sutherland. A 1999 film would reprise that theme at the end of the Persian Gulf War. George Clooney and Mark Wahlberg starred in "Three Kings." In 1981, a hilarious satire reintroduced some antics. "Stripes" had Bill Murray, John Candy and Harold Raimis as Army misfits with brains. "Good Morning, Vietnam" came out in 1987. It was a powerful comedy satire and drama about that war, starring Robin Williams. There are many more military comedies, but these are some of the best that will give movie buffs some excellent entertainment in place of duds like "Suppose They Gave a War."

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Jakealope

It's hard to sink low in Hollywood, but one way is to lead people on that you are making some sort of "profound" anti-war, anti-racism message movie, only to produce a really shallow, laughable at, not with, military comedy. Since they used a then popular antiwar slogan as the title and had a "long haired" soldier walk down the road with a peace sign painted on his duffel bag, it is really insulting that this movie, made during the height of the Vietnam War and protests, DIDN'T EVEN mention the war. OK, they DID, sort of, when Brian Keith told a story about one his men who got shot their in 1956??(Did he transfer from the French Army?) It acted like this was just a peacetime military base with a minor social, public relations problem with their local redneck civilian community. It was set in the South, but the architecture and landscape suggested, guess, Southern California.It also tried to play up the racial angle, which it did a tad more successfully than the anti-war angle, only to submerge it into the townies versus the garrison plot element. It had a pretty good cast, except for some sloppy brat pack boozy acting by Tony Curtis. Even some of the dialog was good. But when you add the childish mash up scene at the end along with the cheap pseudo messaging in the movie's theme, it is a real dud. It is like an (almost) adult version of McHale's Navy, except McHale is playing one of Captain Binghampton's enforcers; the stock redneck Southern sheriff.

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michaeldouglas1

Released around the same time as other "black" comedies like "MASH" and "Catch 22", this one was largely overlooked at the time. It's actually quite a good movie, which explores some of the problems of peace-time garrison life for soldiers during the Vietnam War. It's a comedy, but always with a dark side, shown through the eyes of three old Army buddies, Brian Keith, Tony Curtis, and Ivan Dixon.The underrated Brian Keith is very good as a hard-bitten old combat vet struggling to master "community relations" with a town that clearly resents the presence of an army base nearby (and all the trouble the off-duty soldiers bring). Ivan Dixon (from the "Hogans Heros" TV show) also solid as a sergeant nearing retirement who just wants to own a gas station in the town; only to find the local bank won't lend him the money, considering army personnel "bad risks". And Tony Curtis is also good as the scheming hustler of the three (probably because he's fairly restrained for a change!). Suzanne Pleshette is wonderful as always; the only shame is that she disappears from the plot about half-way through the movie! Don Ameche and Bradford Dillman, among others, lend very competent support.The movie holds it's own quite well, even when Brian Keith and Ivan Dixon "borrow" an old M-7 Priest self-propelled gun (tank) to spring Curtis from the local jail (run by sadistic sheriff Ernest Borgnine). Unfortunately, as with so many comedies of the era, it just can't seem to sustain itself to the end. The movie sinks into silliness in the last reel, when the local "patriotic" militia (led by a very hammy Tom Ewell) tries to stop the tank. Just one look at Ewell's ridiculous uniform and you know the filmmakers have gone for the "cop out" of slapstick humor. Jarringly out of place in a black comedy. It was for this reason I couldn't justify a "10" rating. Still, it IS enjoyable watching the tank crush various old junker cars used by the militia ("I think I'll eat some more cars!" Brian Keith says as he drives the tank). The 1984 James Garner movie "Tank" was loosely inspired by this movie, but wasn't half as good!

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roblanious

I remember watching this as a child at the theater and then on TV (called "War Games") and have not seen it since the mid 70s and miss it. What appealed to me most was the recreation of the Civil War, where again, the American Yankees are forced into war and have to confront bigoted anti-American Southerners. The movie seems to poke fun at the sore losers of a war fought in the 1860s. You cannot help but cheer as a few Yankees take on a half-witted army of a Southern Sheriff as they plow into town riding an old World War 2 M-7 self-propelled artillery gun to liberate a friend from the jail. Compusive actions, however, must not go without consequences. What a funny movie with a good cast.

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