The Worst Film Ever

Plot so thin, it passes unnoticed.

I am only giving this movie a 1 for the great cast, though I can't imagine what any of them were thinking. This movie was horrible

The movie turns out to be a little better than the average. Starting from a romantic formula often seen in the cinema, it ends in the most predictable (and somewhat bland) way.

Swords and sorcery films are one of my preferred genres and a pleasant pass time for me and when I came across this lesser known gem of a movie; imagine my surprise when (for me at least) it ticked most if not all boxes. In fact this is not a S&S movie like say "The sword and the sorcerer" or the two original "Conan" movies but it is an enjoyable (cheesey) rendition of the genre. It wold be better to say that this is a genre of it's own, namely Samurai, magic and princesses. OK, so what did I make of this hokey and laughable highly enjoyable film? Well...in a nutshell...I really enjoyed it. Slow to start off but stick with it and it grows on you. Of course we have the well known actor Sony Chiba in this (from "kill Bill" as if you don't know) which is reason alone to see this. There was one song in this that got stuck in my head and I had to know what it was called. Having hit a dead end using Siri on my iPhone to identify the song I headed to the good ol' internet and IMDb where i discovered that the song was written especially for the dubbed version of this movie and not a bonafied standalone song. Nevertheless I managed to get a copy and play it on iTunes now.I would love to know what other people make of this movie and the soundtrack so if you are into sword, sorcery, samurais and light shows (don't ask) then give this a chance. Hopefully, you'll enjoy it as much as I did.

I love samurai films. Especially crazy ones. Cheesy ones. And "Legend of 8 Samurai" (even though the script used ninjas instead of Samurais) doesn't disappoint on both accounts. However for its long-winded running time this gaudy Japanese 80s (even though it looks older than that) period ninja fantasy hokum just doesn't deliver enough of it. Sometimes fairly ponderous (especially the journey part gathering all the 8 ninjas), but many distractions finds its way in. Like the god-awful, out-of-sync dubbing. The tasty dialogues are outrageously daft, but the dubbing only tops it off. It's funny… especially the out-the-place tones in the voices. One character goes about discussing his regrets, where he killed women and children and for some reason the dubbed voice seems so gleeful despite the sorrow-filled actions. Although there's a wry smile evident. Then we get these retro guitar riffs, electronic beeps and power ballads finding its way in. Talk about painful, namely the corny American induced power ballads. You know, it accompanies the love-making sequences or scenes of utter happiness. To balance out the cheese. We get colourful costumes, plastic armour, hokey sets, important historical picture stories, curses aplenty, blood bathing, hysterical screaming, evil cackling, puffed-up sulking, delicious snake eating, heart-felt flute playing, magical crystals, an demon rock with flickering lights, voices from beyond the grave, a gigantic flying snake and centipede (yep it's a sight to behold), glowing bow and arrow set and excitingly kinetic action set-pieces of martial arts combat. It's very well staged with some atmospheric encounters early on and plenty of scope within its framing, but it doesn't really fire in to full gear until it reaches its unsparingly climatic battle of good vs. evil. The stilted plot is dramatic, but at the same time a complete mess involving tragedy, witchcraft, romance and one's fate in almost capturing a surreal daytime serial vibe to it all. Must have been the music soundtrack. Hey was that a car horn I just heard too? The villains are sinister, exaggeratedly zany and pure comic quality. You know, they just build themselves up (being so evil) for one great fall. The 8 samurais (ah I mean ninjas) had some interesting drawings (albeit stereotypical), but their character arches are never truly expanded on. Disappointing. Instead more time is spent on the two young leads (which starred Hiroyuki Sanada). The performances are okay with Sonny Chiba making an appearance. Directed by Kinji Fukasaku (who would be known for "Battle Royale"), there are some interesting visuals and charming special F/X despite the scratchy low-budget look. Daftly out of sorts, but fun junky nonsense."There's no power on this earth that can destroy us". Wrong!

SPOILERS AHEAD! You have been warned!Much of what I could say about this movie has already been said by other reviewers, with some minor exceptions.Story elements -- for example, turning the group of captive women into magic temptresses with poisonous breath -- get introduced and then dropped, or brought back for a few seconds' cameo at best (the poisonous women turn out quite pathetic, achieving only one kill among them). Also, if you've seen this movie and watched the scene where the entire backstory is explained via scroll, you will know what I mean when I say: whatever happened to the dog? The reincarnated princess gets her father's lightsaber, I mean her predecessor's flute, but the dog puts in no reappearance as a dog or as a human (unless I missed something very subtle about either Hiroyuki Sanada's or Sonny Chiba's characters)... and he was, shall we say, rather important to the original princess. And although the tragic female ribbon dancer/swordfighter (far classier than her descendant, O-Ren Ishii) gets relatively little screen time, it's still more than the later additions to the group get in terms of character development or backstory, which is practically none. Chiba doesn't even get one line of clichéd surprise that two of the crystal-holders are a woman and a young boy. I can only conclude that the movie was written and edited under the same sort of chemical influence required to fully enjoy it.I also believe that Sanada must have had a clause in his contract requiring his thighs to be on display at all times. (Not that there's anything wrong with that.) Indeed, in one scene he falls to the ground unconscious, and Chiba slings him over his shoulder and carries him toward the camera. Sanada's butt and thighs occupy the center of shot for a surprisingly long time before the director cuts away. So there are indeed redeeming moments in this movie. (Another is when the group has defeated the giant centipede demon, which had approached them disguised as an old woman, and one of the samurai astutely remarks, "THAT wasn't your mother!") A sidenote: as much as the movie borrows from Lucas, which is quite a lot, he seems to have borrowed back from it for aspects of the Star Wars prequel trilogy. The demon matriarch's headgear wouldn't look a bit out of place on Queen Amidala in "The Phantom Menace," and Lucas does the dropped-story-element (midichlorians, anyone?) and underdeveloped-character (wuxia master Ray Park as Darth Maul; the assorted villains -- Jango Fett, Count Dooku, General Grievous; most of the Jedi Council) routines like a master.One point for having Sonny Chiba in it (there are other elements in this movie that show up in "Kill Bill," in whose first volume Chiba has a small honorific role). One point for Hiroyuki Sanada's butt. One point for strong female characters. One point for the interesting sociological fact that apparently, evil undead demon clans have no incest taboos. (It is, however, a mystery to me why the matriarch is attracted to her son, who is sort of the medieval Japanese Jame Gumb.) Minus several million for the soundtrack. I found myself devoutly hoping that the writer and singer of those godawful pop ballads would be crushed in the destruction of the castle.

Legend of Eight Samurai...aka...Japanese Ripoff of American Blockbusters of late 70s and early 80s.The majority of the plot stitched together by the patchwork of the first three Star Wars films.So bitterly ironic since Lucas has credited the Japanese classic The Hidden Fortress by the late, great Akira Kurosawa as a heavy influence for his first Star Wars film.Open as an evil empire converges at their fortress to solidify their evilness with the heads of the entire royal family. All save for one! A Princess?! They need to find the princess to complete their task!And of course, that feisty princess is on her way to meet up with her uncle.But runs into a feisty, bratty pretty-boy who wants to be a fighter like the others. As well as her older protector who will unite a band of special warriors to defeat the Empire... Sound familiar?This flick is chock-ful-o-Lucas-clichés:Darth Vader...err... I mean, the evil queen proclaiming the pretty-boy is her son. NOOOO! I'll never join you!The group fighting a serpentine creature in the trash compacto...err... I mean, bowels of the Death Sta...err... I mean, Castle.Obi Wan...err... I mean, Sonny Chiba's character constantly being the sage leading the feisty princess... all the while knowing his time is finite.There's even rip-offs of the other great Lucas franchise, Raiders of the Lost Ark:The re-creation of the famous boulder opening. Snakes, why does it always have to be snakes. And the over-abundance of pistols... even though everything else in the film dates it to a time long before pistols were even invented. Speaking of which, you gotta dig the times when they failed to eliminate modern elements from the shots. Like telephone poles.Still, campy fun. Thought truly painful at times. Like the love scene with the cheesy early 80s rock ballad score. They keep cutting back and forth between some painful, badly framed love-making shot and one of the eight samurai statues. So you keep counting off each Samurai statue shot, urging the editor to cut to another statue fast in order to end the painful scene.And as far as that other review I read that claimed video games ripped THIS movie off?! That is giving this little seen flick far too much credit.