Let's be realistic.

It is both painfully honest and laugh-out-loud funny at the same time.

By the time the dramatic fireworks start popping off, each one feels earned.

By the time the dramatic fireworks start popping off, each one feels earned.

Smugglers disguised as Navy Personnel are bringing French Liqueurs into the country. Unfortunately, they decided to drop them off in a nature reserve watched over by Lady Flavia Queensway (Grenfell). Concerned about her beloved bird population being in danger from the transgressors, she informs Customs and Excise of the events. They send Agent Kenyon (Patrick) to check it out. This, in turn, leads them to a more important smuggling ring who are about to bring in a large volume of drugs. Kenyon sets out on their trail, which takes him to the south of France and closer to one of the suspects than he would like.What makes this such an enjoyable movie to watch is the lightheartedness within the script. This at first centres around Lady Flavia Queensway. Since this is played by the great Joyce Grenfell, how else was this going to be played(?). Then later in situations, especially those between Rita (Sellars) and Kenyon. However, this is not a comedy film and the drama, intrigue, and suspense are evident in every scene. All of this is enough to keep the viewer interested.Then you add in the acting and it's hard to walk away from the movie until it's finished... even to pause it for a toilet break. The cast is solid and everybody is superb in their roles, though it's Theodore Bikel as Max who stood out the most for me. There's an air of menace and power to his character whenever he's on screen. Even when he's playing the guitar to entertain his guests.Though there are some places in the story that are realistic and believable it's the south of France section that feels a little awkward. It's hard to believe that Customs and Excise would be able to afford Kenyon's lifestyle as he lives it up, OO7 style. Though this is forgivable as it progresses the story nicely and it's more than a little entertaining to watch.If you like your thrillers to have a lighthearted entertainment value this film is right in your ballpark. I would recommend this to all thriller and suspense fans out there. It's a great way to spend a Sunday afternoon after dinner.

Somewhere at the back of my mind was the memory of a film where a speeding car attempts to cross Tower Bridge just as it was opening - and fails. And here it is. It's quite a spectacular scene, making best use of one of London's best known landmarks. That the car is a Rolls Royce adds to the thrills (budgets in 1954 didn't run to crashing a modern Rolls Royce though). It forms the climax of an exciting car chase - and the demise of the villain. The inspiration may well have been the true life story not of a car jumping the bridge but on the 30th December 1952 a red bus full of passengers. By sheer good luck the other side opened more slowly and thus was slightly lower causing the bus to drop some feet but at least get across.Like IMDb reviews, critics have very mixed opinions on this film. Halliwell, the one time doyenne critic and ITV film buyer dismissed it as "typical British thick-ear". but writer, film critic and author of "A Guide to the Best in Cinema Thrills", John Howard Reid is very complimentary about it in nearly all departments (assuming that the IMDb reviewer above is one and the same person?). I agree with but defer to his much more expert and detailed judgement. Jack Warner again has a good role as a detective - quite different to his ageing avuncular flatfoot PC George Dixon on TV.A 6.5 out of 10

Forbidden Cargo – 1954 H.M. customs receives a phone call about the Royal Navy landing goods and equipment at a private bird sanctuary. Customs contacts the Navy and discovers they know nothing about it.Inspector Nigel Patrick gets the case and stakes out the beach in question. Joyce Grenfell, the owner of the beach, says that every two weeks there is a landing. Sure enough a DUKW lands and starts off loading dozens of boxes into a large truck.Patrick follows the truck to an abandoned WW2 airfield where the boxes are stored in an old barracks. That night Patrick breaks in and checks out the boxes. They are full of expensive French Cognac and such. The smugglers must be making fortune in evading the tax man.Two weeks later, Patrick, along with a dozen Policemen, hide in the dunes and wait for the smugglers to show. The DUKW lands and the Police pounce grabbing the crew, the goods, and the DUKW.Several days later, the Captain of the DUKW, Eric Pohlmann, who is out on bail pays a visit to Patrick. He offers to spill about his bosses if he can cut a deal on his smuggling charges. He gives Patrick a small bit of info as a good faith gesture. His bosses will be bringing 30 pounds of heroin into the UK in two weeks. Patrick sets up a meeting for the next day.Pohlmann, however, does not keep the meeting. He has been fished out of the Thames in a less than breathing state. The Police find a letter with a London address and phone number.Patrick, using a cover story that he is a insurance investigator, checks said address and finds Elizabeth Sellars and Terence Morgan. The brother and sister swear they never heard of Pohlmann.Patrick does some more digging and finds that the two, have been travelling every two weeks to, and from the south of France.Patrick follows them to Nice to keep an eye on them. The pair are staying on a yacht with a wealthy shipping heiress, Greta Gynt. Gynt and her man Friday, Theodore Bikel seem to be in the clear as far as Patrick can discover.All Morgan and Sellars seem to be doing is hitting the party circuit at night and scuba diving by day.Two weeks go by and Sellars and Morgan fly back to London. Patrick follows and reports to his boss, Jack Warner, he failed to find anything on the pair.The only clue they have is that one of Gynt's ships is docking that day. The Customs boys board the ship and search it from stem to stern looking for the heroin. They find nothing.They find nothing because Morgan and Sellars attached a waterproof container under the hull to hold the dope. They had done this during their scuba dives at Nice. The freighter had been docked in Nice at the time. When the ship hits the UK, Morgan will do his frogman act again and retrieve the dope.It finally dawns on Patrick what is going on when Sellars is captured piloting a small boat near the freighter.The police and Customs lads track down Morgan and the drugs and the chase is on. We now discover that Bikel and Gynt are in on the dope smuggling. The pair are quickly slapped in cuffs. Morgan escapes in a car but ends up at the bottom of the Thames without the benefit of his scuba gear. Case closed.The director was Harold French. THE MAN WHO WATCHED TRAINS GO BY is his most well known film. The d of p was C.M. Pennington. His work includes, OBSESSION, DESPERATE MOMENT and 1984, Patrick was in, UNEASY TERMS, THE NOOSE, SILENT DUST, A PRIZE OF GOLD, THE MAN INSIDE, SAPPHIRE and THE INFORMERS.Sellars had roles in, GUILT IS MY SHADOW, HUNTED, THE GENTLE GUNMAN, THE BROKEN HORSESHOE, THE LONG MEMORY, RECOIL, 3 CASES OF MURDER and NEVER LET GO. (b/w)

This movie is kind of fun. If you imagined that working from Customs was boring and uninteresting, this will change your mind. Kenyon the Customs inspector travels to the South of France, consorts with beautiful women, stays in luxury motels, and generally lives a very high life.It's not a bad story about a brother and sister drug smuggling ring that is busted open my modest men from Customs in tweed jackets and narrow ties.