The Worst Film Ever

Really Surprised!

Overrated

If you don't like this, we can't be friends.

Susan George plays Marianne, a young go-go dancer in London apt to running away from any man who takes a liking to her; she's not fickle, exactly, she just has a troubled past with men starting with her nefarious father, nicknamed "the Judge." After a fellow picks Marianne up on the road, she finds herself at the altar about to marry him, but enters their best man's name on the marriage certificate instead. This enrages her intended, who turns snitch to the Judge (and Marianne's wicked half-sister) who's in desperate need of a Swiss bank account number that only Marianne knows, an account that houses legal papers incriminating the Judge in various dirty doings. Written by Murray Smith and directed by Pete Walker (who also produced), the misleadingly-titled "Die Screaming Marianne" (without a comma) isn't a horror movie or a suspense-thriller; it's more of a character portrait-cum-criminal melodrama, one that is curiously coy in its violent and sexual matters. George is seen dancing in a bedazzled bikini under the opening credits, but she doesn't dance again, nor does she get much of a chance to create a genuine character. Marianne is unpredictable in all the wrong ways; she's a question-mark whose actions are confusing, confounding and often reach a dead-end (running off from her new husband in the early morning hours, she hitches a ride, stops to rest in the meadow grass, applies for a dancing job, turns it down when the boss asks to "see the goods," and then returns home). Finale at the Judge's seaside spread in Portugal is even odder, with lustful, jealous Judy Huxtable bent on torturing Marianne to get that account number before killing her. Before long, bodies have piled up, corpses have to be identified, the cops are on their way, and we still have no idea who Marianne is. *1/2 from ****

Pretty much everything I want to say about this movie has already been stated in other reviews. I want to reiterate several points in the hopes of preventing others from making the same mistake as those of us who spent time on this one.I watched this right to the end, so I won't say that it is entirely boring--it had me wanting to know how it would resolve. However, every plot point was absolutely wasted--everything that happens to each character is anti-climactic. More than anything else, it is poorly written.Yes, Susan George is nice to watch, but that is about it. It is falsely marketed as horror, and I blame IMDb for allowing it to be categorized as such. It is almost entirely drama, although it aspires to be a thriller. I don't think it could have been less effective at building tension if it was a Disney Channel original. It's just not a good story. There are moments when they could have had the characters do something much more nasty, but I just thought their choices were lame.To give you an idea of where I'm coming from, I like a lot of low-budget, obscure, and independent productions. I enjoy bad movies when they are entertaining. I saw the low rating and thought that's what this movie is, but if you read through the comments, you'll see most of us thought it was just boring.

Forget PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE or BRIDE OF THE MONSTER. This gem, which was released in the early 80s in a very gory video box, was marketed as a horror film, yet is really a lame drama about 2 cops searching for a lost girl. Everyone even remotely connected to this film (especially it's video release) should be jailed for life.

Pic is routine in all respects and a real timewaster! Marketed as a horror film, it's nothing more than a boring tale of a dysfunctional family trying to lay their mitts on a numbered Swiss Bank account containing incriminating documents, along with a sizeable amount of cash. Poor Marianne is about to inherit this stash on her 21st birthday, but her father and sister want to grab it from her. Nothing horrific (nor even interesting) here.The cast is decidedly drab and unattractive (even toplined Susan George is unflatteringly photographed)and performances are strictly of the stock variety. Potentially interesting Portuguese scenery is also wasted by the pedestrian set-ups employed by helmer Pete Walker.Director Walker made a few mildly interesting films ("House of Whipcord", "Frightmare") along with a goodly amount of dreck. Thankfully he retired in '82, saving viewers from further boredom.