disgusting, overrated, pointless

A movie that not only functions as a solid scarefest but a razor-sharp satire.

I think this is a new genre that they're all sort of working their way through it and haven't got all the kinks worked out yet but it's a genre that works for me.

Unshakable, witty and deeply felt, the film will be paying emotional dividends for a long, long time.

I was short of something to do this afternoon and saw this on the listings - big mistake! Wooden acting and sets that defy description are just part of the problem. For example the train carriages must be 20 feet wide - the corridors are about 6 feet and the compartments even more. If you've ever been on a real train with compartments (sleeping or otherwise) you'll know just how cramped they are.As for the acting, well I try not to use foul language, but in this case it's the only way to describe it - so I'll just leave it at that.In all I'd recommend that anyone thinking of watching it doesn't bother - unless you have no taste at all!

The only reason to watch this film is to see a future Academy Award winning actor doing something abjectly horrible to pay the bills.The best part is when Waltz skips off through the train laughing maniacally towards the end. The rest is just... poorly acted rubbish. If you're watching this with the desire to see more of Waltz acting in English... do yourself a favor, and skip it.Everyone has a few stinkers in their back pocket and this is Mr. Waltz's. Mark Roper must be a pseudonym for garbage as this, and Queens Messenger (Queen's Mess) are just horrid, flawed, nonsensical films with terrible acting, cheap locations, and plots that make no sense whatsoever.

Okay, all-time b-movie action hero Richard Grieco (remember Booker and 20 Jump Street?) meets up with some rich European and American people on a luxury train for a New Year's Eve trip across Europe, and of course a bunch of Islamic terrorists takes the train and blackmails the poor Western citizens... and of course it's Grieco's and some well-looking model's turn to find some bombs on the train and fight the foreign terrorist power...It's sometimes impressing how the casting people decide for a film's actors. This time, German non-actor Christoph Waltz, notorious for his never-moving face expressions, plays an Islamic terrorist leader. Grieco rather looks like an early nineties' Seattle grunge guitarist and is really misplaced on a high-society luxury train, and the rest of the actors... well, after the film is over, you're lucky that you have survived the big express to boredom. Nor a highlight amongst the terrorists on a train movies, neither an entertaining action flick really... skip it!

With a small budget, Mr. Roper populates a railroad station with a large cast of extras who do very little but give a false sense of grandeur. We are introduced to a cast of characters who could, under certain circumstances, be interesting. There is a McGuffen that holds promise for fascinating interaction and believable action. None of these things occur.The mismatched cast bumbles through dialogue unfit for human consumption. The continuity is so bad that sections of the transparent plot simply seem to disappear. But it all grinds on in weary tedium until someone, I forget just who, blows up something and everyone kisses and makes up somewhere in Bulgaria or another.In the fifties, this thing would go directly to a drive-in to be shown late at night to clear out the loiterers. Today, it has no place in the company of art and artists. Please, God, let there not be a sequel.