not as good as all the hype

This movie tries so hard to be funny, yet it falls flat every time. Just another example of recycled ideas repackaged with women in an attempt to appeal to a certain audience.

It is encouraging that the film ends so strongly.Otherwise, it wouldn't have been a particularly memorable film

Blistering performances.

This film started ok but went downhill very quickly. Slow evolving plot and the poor acting made it slower.

Felt kinda fresh in all honesty, I'm just sadden by the fact that it didn't lay some kind of rules down. What is it? Can it be killed? Stopped? Slowed down? Sure, overall we have some data about it, and it does respect all said but I think it could have provided a lot more tension if we had more to work with.Anyway, without further ado, Child Eater made the best of its budget, plot, actors, had a very good execution for such a production and managed to delivered on some levels. It starts rather fast I might say and goes on to create a good little world for itself.If only more horrors would try this approach, and not rely so much on gore, blood and ripoff all other movies and genres, like zombies and torture porn in the woods.Cheers!

Child Eater started as a short back in 2012. Icelandic director Erlingur Thoroddsen later put it on Kickstarter in hopes of getting enough financial backing to make it into a feature film, and raised $15,000 this way, releasing it in 2016. I watched the full film and then the short later in the day and, honestly, while the full length version was very similar to its origin, I thought the short was better in many ways.The plot centers largely on Helen (Cait Bliss), the newly pregnant daughter of the local sheriff. Her father volunteers her for a night of babysitting for a man who just moved into town, which is where she meets Lucas (Colin Critchley), a bird-watching boy who has a very active imagination when it comes to believing he is being watched and stalked by a boogeyman. But before long she realizes it isn't just in his mind…** SPOILERS! **I know that the name — the simple title — of a movie has no real bearing on its quality, but Child Eater caught my eye in two different ways. I was scrolling through Amazon just looking for something new and simultaneously thought "huh, that's kind of a silly name" and "oh, a monster who eats children is pretty intriguing". Unfortunately the villain in this film doesn't really do a whole lot of child eating at all. What gives?The acting was kind of hit or miss. I actually thought Colin Critchley, the one child actor, was arguably the best. And, surprisingly, I thought Cait Bliss, who plays the babysitter, Helen, was a bit better — or at least more natural — in the short. But the father was forgettable, the entire police force was laughable, and Helen's ex-boyfriend (or whoever he actually was) was just dead weight. Ultimately things were pretty cliché and stiff, with such classic lines as "I'm pregnant" and "I was the one that got away" and "They thought he was dead… but evil never dies" and "This ends now" ALL uttered at one point or another.The one funny realization I had while watching this was thinking about how much I would have a hard time soothing my own scared child. In any movie like this the kid says "there's a monster in my closet!" and the babysitter or parent says, with no doubt in their mind, "of course there isn't" and is content to just leave the room. I would be ALL UP IN THAT CLOSET and making sure I peeked around the curtains and under the bed, too, and then sitting on the edge of the kid's bed discussing theories of how we think the monster got in and out so stealthily. Probably not healthy for either of us.The boogey man himself, Robert Bowery (Jason Martin) looks sort of cool and almost troll-like the first few times we see him… but, as is often the case with lower budget films, he lost some of his fright factor when we saw him in more light and realized he more closely resembles a thinner and older Morpheus. I wish he had more back story to kind of flesh out his character a bit. Initially you think he's just a regular (albeit sadistic) old man, but then he's taking multiple bullets and still running after people and we've got this story about a black stork calling babies up to a hill so he can pluck their eyes out and things get a bit jumbled.Ultimately, the short did more for me because I feel like the story was fine in a more abbreviated delivery. If the feature film had done more to explain Robert Bowery's character or motivation, fleshed out the other characters, or really done anything more than just having people running through the woods it may have changed my mind. But, sadly, not a huge fan.

The film opens with a man with macular degeneration removing the eyes of children and consuming them under the belief it will cure his illness. We then jump 25 years later. Helen (Cait Bliss) is babysitting for the new family as dad (Weston Wilson) has to be out all night. Lucas (Colin Critchley) likes horror movies and claims there is a man in his closet, the same one he saw outside, who can get in through the hole in the basement. He gives us too many plot clues in one moment.Lucas goes missing. We are told by Ginger (Melinda Chilton) that Lucas who just moved in, "knows the woods like the back of his hand" watch for bear traps along the paths...seriously? Now the kicker is after 25 years of macular degeneration, for which there is no cure, our man can still see and in the dark no less...and still fights after a shot to the head.The film initially has effective jump scares, but there are only so many times you can go to that well. Unfortunately Cait Bliss looks like the babysitter we get in real life. To be an 80's throwback film you need a "10" who makes out with her boyfriend on the sofa.The film doesn't develop any characters except for Helen, and she was done rather poorly. I don't like people who put their cigarette out in their unfinished food. It just looks trashy, like a tribal tattoo.Guide: F-word. No sex or nudity. Winner best film/actress/cinematography Fantastically Horrifying Cinema Festival 2016 On a side note: The first words spoken were "He Hurt Me" which gave me XFL flashbacks to "He Hate Me." (I wonder what happened to that guy.) Anyway I just watched the XFL to see if I recognized any of the cheerleaders from strip joints. I had to stop watching when the game started as the overhead cam gave me vertigo