The Worst Film Ever

From my favorite movies..

Like the great film, it's made with a great deal of visible affection both in front of and behind the camera.

One of the most extraordinary films you will see this year. Take that as you want.

In his mid-Sixties when he made this film, Stallone looks really ripped, doesn't he? It's good to know a few celebrities out there care enough about how they look to maintain a healthy regimen of exercise, but man, Stallone must take it to the gym every chance he gets. You don't get to look like that without putting some work into it.Now as for the picture, kind of par for the course for an action flick, but I dig these kinds of movies when they've got guys like Stallone or Van Damme in them. I'd have included Steven Seagal but apparently he doesn't have a gym membership. Have you seen him lately? Sad.Anyway, Stallone's not a good guy in this one, even if he is the principal player. He's an assassin doing contract work, but following his latest job his partner gets taken out and James 'Bobo' Bonomo (Stallone) is only slightly bummed about it. When a detective from Washington, D.C. arrives on scene investigating the death of a dirty cop, the pair reluctantly team up to uncover a network of corruption.I don't know, I didn't care for Sung Kang as Detective Taylor Kwan. He just didn't seem to have the kind of charisma needed to play off Stallone's character. Think Kurt Russell in "Tango and Cash". Kwan was a little overbearing as well in regard to wanting to deal with Bobo as a criminal once their team-up was over with. Come on, the guy saved your butt umpteen times and you want to take him down? Where's the rationale for that? Nice work by Jason Momoa as hit-man Keegan in the story. I don't think I've seen him before; he could probably use a little more enthusiasm as a professional assassin, but he got the job done. I liked the idea that he got to take out all his bosses before this was over with, but good as he was, you're never gonna beat Stallone in his own picture.Anyone else wonder what happened to the Russian hooker?

James 'Jimmy Bobo' Bonomo is a hit-man working with his partner in New Orleans, here always referred to as 'Crescent City'. After their latest job, killing a corrupt cop from Washington DC, they go to get paid but things don't go to plan; somebody kills Jimmy's partner and tries to kill him. Meanwhile DC cop Taylor Kwon is in town investigating what happened to his former colleague and why. He quickly realises that Jimmy was involved and contacts him suggesting that they work together to find out who was ultimately behind the hit. Jimmy isn't initially keen to work with a cop but eventually they form an uneasy temporary alliance and start working their way up the criminal food chain. It won't be easy for them there are corrupt local cops trying to kill them as well as the bad guys.This is hardly a classic film but if you are a fan of the genre it passes the time well enough. The central partnership is entertaining precisely because Jimmy and Taylor have no real chemistry; they both dislike what the other stands for. There is plenty of exciting action; the best being an axe fight between Jimmy and the man who killed his partner. The story is solid enough although there are no real surprises. Sylvester Stallone is solid enough as Jimmy and Sung Kang is pretty good as Taylor. The rest of the cast are perfectly fine, notably Christian Slater who is fun as a sleazy lawyer; Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje as the man behind everything; Sarah Shahi as Jimmy's daughter who gets caught up in the events and Jason Momoa as a hit-man who enjoys his work a little too much. Overall this is a decent enough way to pass the time if you are fan of the genre but not really a must see unless you are a Stallone completist.

A sad and depressing little film which shows how badly time has ravaged Stallone. He has never been that much of an actor but as an ageing hit-man he simply is not credible. The axe fight is about as stupid an idea for a climax as I have ever seen and the idea that Stallone's character could ever prevail against someone of Jason Momea's physical prowess defies belief. The scene in the car where the bent local cop is holding his gun to Sung Kang's head before getting his own head shot by Stallone is, perhaps, even more far-fetched. How could Stallone approach the car unseen and line up such a difficult shot i.e. one that did not also put Sung Kang at risk of being in the line of fire. The rest of the film is full of clichés so familiar that I cannot help but think that film scripts are being written by a machine based solely on what was in films that made money before and repeating the same ideas in a slightly different combination. Brainless plotting, poor acting a real turkey. Anyone who rates this film is deluded!

New Orleans. Corrupt cops on the payroll of this sleazy businessman who wants to flatten ghetto buildings and build condominiums. Baptiste aligns himself with plenty of crooked scum and then when they appear to no longer be in his best interest, they're iced. So you have Stallone's long-term con/hit-man, Jimmy, who does a job for one of Baptiste's many "handlers", but he loses his partner thanks to a menacing ex-militant named Keegan (played by steely-eyed Jason Mamoa, quite convincing as a brooding psychotic with a serpentine smile). Keegan seems more interested in killing than necessarily being paid for his hit-jobs. Baptiste also has a corrupt lawyer (played by a wasted Christian Slater) who has a flashdrive containing all the man's illegal activities. Soon Jimmy must join forces reluctantly (and vice versa) with a DC detective, Kwon (Sung Kang). Kwon has a key link to DC who filters plenty of information his way, and this does assist Jimmy in his conquest to kill Keegan and get paid what was owed to him for the assassination of a coke-snorting bastard disgraced cop. Oh, yeah, Jimmy has a tattoo-artist daughter (Sarah Shahi) soon kidnapped (obviously) by Keegan and Baptiste to be used as leverage. Well, the film delivers what the title promises…lots of bullets in heads. Walter Hill knows how to shoot gunfights and action, but Bullet in the Head is beneath him in terms of his marvelous resume as a director. This is the kind of movie you'd expect to find cheap in those five buck sets loaded with less-than-spectacular actioners similar in type. Nothing at all stands out about this film that would indicate it has staying power to remain in your mind an hour after you watch it. Stallone does get to utter a John Wayne line, "That'll be the day," when Kwon tells him if he continues to "be bad" he'll come after him. Mamoa is the classic B-movie action mercenary. His ax fight with Stallone and subsequent fail due to the partner's switchblade (the partner of Stallone murdered by Mamoa; this act setting off the rest of the movie) are staples the action genre never fails to capitalize on in storytelling…the hero (or, this case, anti-hero) sees an objective in his sights, fueled by the captivity of his daughter and murder of six-year partner, and that is the muscled heavy daring him to fight. Kwon basically looks cool and plays it straight, allowing Stallone to dominate the proceedings as is customary in these movies. Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje is fun as the morally destitute, crippled businessman with a devil-may-care attitude towards anyone that is of little use to him or his rise in power. Stallone has done a hell of a lot better than this; even the likes of Lock-up or even Avenging Angelo are as good as this film. You can just mark this off as a minuscule example of Hill's worst. This still is loaded with bullets destroying bodies, so there's at least that. Stallone holds this disgruntled pose and his delivery is quite John Wayne if the Duke was filled with disgust.