Very Cool!!!

A story that's too fascinating to pass by...

It’s not bad or unwatchable but despite the amplitude of the spectacle, the end result is underwhelming.

what a terribly boring film. I'm sorry but this is absolutely not deserving of best picture and will be forgotten quickly. Entertaining and engaging cinema? No. Nothing performances with flat faces and mistaking silence for subtlety.

I used to have this movie on the original VHS and I used to watch it all of the time, and I always found it to be fun. The story goes as such: a really, really sleazy theatre chain operator, he bootlegs copies of the movies that he shows, and who shows movies like "Amputee Prostitutes", has come up with a brilliant new idea. Open up a long abandoned theatre as a singleplex, and steal from that one too. The trouble is that the theatre has a shady past, people died there, although we never learn the particulars. So he sends his three most capable employees, which ain't saying much, over to his new property to clean it up and to get it ready for its grand opening. This movie then splits into two as the movie details the plot (?) from two important viewpoints; the home office and the new property. And then both murders and supernatural events happen. The movie proceeds down its road of predictability, as it is populated with a cast of characters that are all scheming and who are dumber than dirt. Maybe I was just in a forgiving mood, or maybe I got its tongue-in-cheek snarkiness as the whole movie came across as a Saturday Night Live, or National Lampoon parody of a horror slasher. This is a movie chock filled with murder, bad music, bad acting, bad special effects, bad dubbing, a cheesy soundtrack, college girls in cheerleader outfits, a homicidal ghost, slapstick, a cast whose careers were ended by this movie, a decent body count, a mugging, a dead rat, an out-of-control fog machine, Jamie Foxx in too tight golden spandex pants, a topless Jamie Foxx in a catfight, a death by popcorn machine, a plot that makes absolutely no damn sense, and Mary Woranov who looks like she's having a blast stealing every single scene she's in. And don't miss how she quits her jog. Go Mary!!! I mean, what's not to like here? I found myself laughing continuously, in a movie richly deserving of cult status. Why hasn't this movie been released on Blue Ray already? Bad movie mavens everywhere should see this movie if they can.

Watching this, my heart broke for the actors. What could it have been like actually being in this? And it holds the distinction of being the most ineptly directed movie I've ever seen, and I'm well into Senior Citizen status.The premise isn't bad. Three very young employees at a cineplex are handed the keys to an wonderful old cinema and told to clean the place up so that it can be reopened.The premise isn't bad. The movie is.It's about 80 minutes long, but moves at a snail's pace. Nothing except some brief nudity livens up the first two acts. At long last the theater opens, a local news crew spouts some exposition about the theater's history, a few characters are killed, mostly offstage. The original owner of the cinema shows up, he's killed by the Last Girl, she runs to a pay phone and calls the police. It ends with the police arriving.I'd guess that the people who made this have a background acting and directing for the stage. I realized- and this was more upsetting than any of the "horror" elements- that people would say a line, pause, beat, two, three, four, and someone else would say a line. This was because they were inserting these pauses so that the audience's laughter wouldn't cover the lines.Uh, kids. Let me be frank with you. Those lines aren't funny. Not the least bit.There were exactly two good things about this film. The actress/writer/painter/sculptor Mary Woronov is always fun to watch, but her performance was arch and mannered. She realized that the people acting opposite her had nothing to give, and seemed bored.Best yet, the 'haunted' theater is one of those wonderful old downtown single screen movie palaces that young audiences probably have never experienced. It brought back the days of my youth and young adulthood at the Loew's (where I saw my very first movie, a re-release of THE WIZARD OF OZ, when I was a small child) , Metropolitan, and Majestic in Houston, the Jefferson in Beaumont, the Paramount and State in Austin, and, best of all, the Aztec in San Antonio.

A movie theater with a bad history of past gruesome murders reopens. Of course, the bloody killings start anew. Written, directed, shot, scored and edited with an appalling lack of flair and finesse by the singularly talentless Rick Sloane (who later disgraced celluloid some more with the absolutely atrocious "Hobgoblins"), this horrendously ham-fisted attempt at a slasher spoof strikes out something rotten in every conceivable way: the excruciatingly lethargic pacing, the painfully static, grainy cinematography (there's a stinky surplus of drab master shots featured throughout), an annoyingly droning and redundant hum'n'shiver synthesizer score, the flat (non)direction, a tediously talky and uneventful script, the groan-inducing sophomoric sense of lowbrow humor, the bloodless murder set pieces, a pitifully unscary killer (he's just some wrinkled-up old guy in pasty make-up), the uniformly obnoxious and unappealing characters, a dissatisfyingly abrupt ending, and lifeless performances from a noticeably uninspired cast all ensure that watching this schlocky swill is about as fun and rewarding as eating rancid raw eels drenched with sour vinegar. This crud totally lacks the necessary crude charm and sleazy vigor required to be enjoyable junk. Instead it's just a bland, plodding and meandering stiff that never catches fire or becomes even remotely amusing in a so-shoddy-it's-smoking sort of way. Only a smidgen of nudity and the delightful presence of the always dependable Mary Woronov as a snarky, sardonic secretary provide a little relief from the overall crumminess of this lousy loser.

Mary Woronov and the chick that plays Selina (the bitch of the group) were the saving graces of this movie. There is barely any blood, the acting is bad, the killings are off screen, but on the other hand it has a couple of funny moments, topless nudity, it has a high body count and a lot of good one-liners. See it, you'll laugh a lot.