A different way of telling a story

Fanciful, disturbing, and wildly original, it announces the arrival of a fresh, bold voice in American cinema.

Blending excellent reporting and strong storytelling, this is a disturbing film truly stranger than fiction

An old-fashioned movie made with new-fashioned finesse.

Alright, now, I have no idea if this was done as a deliberate comedy, a self-aware, tongue-in-cheek spoof of low budget sci-fi flicks, or if they were really trying to be serious here and just failed spectacularly, but Actium Maximus, this hideous, shrieking beast of a movie, is hard on the viewers' eyes and ears regardless of the filmmakers' intentions.My biggest gripe with the movie was *by far* the audio. I had an absurdly difficult time understanding the dialogue (unless it was subtitled, which it mercifully was in many scenes), because the robotic/futuristic distortion effects that were used for most of the alien voices rendered their speech almost completely unintelligible, not to mention an irritating chore to listen to. Tragically, most of the (painfully jargon-infested) dialogue in this movie is expositional and pretty much essential to understanding the story and the setting, so not being able to discern what's being said definitely is a problem. Or maybe not, considering that ---spoiler ahead--- *none* of the established conflicts and crises are actually resolved in any way whatsoever. Instead, the viewer is given the middle finger in the form of a "To Be Continued..." message after over an hour worth of nothing but buildup. Delicious.Of course, the other major issue are the visuals. I have absolutely nothing against "bad", low budget special effects in general, nor do I reject movies that deliberately opt for a cheap look, whether for comedic effect or just for style, but this disaster is where I have to draw the line. The effects in Actium Maximus are bad to the point of being a severe distraction and hindrance to the plot. After a while, I was no longer just sitting there, watching a movie, but actually squinting at the screen, guessing the contents of conversations and hoping to figure out what the hell the makers where trying to convey with the confusing, chaotic imagery.All in all, Actium Maximus is a nasty, messy and overall grating ordeal. It gets a 2 only for some of its genuinely impressive set miniatures, and the somewhat admirable guts the producers must have had for even attempting an ambitious project like this on such a damningly tight budget.

This was a shockingly bad movie and I literally gasped the first time seeing the Blue Screen puppets. Imagine the worst Blue Screen special effects you ever saw, make it somehow far worse, and then combine this with poorly made, rubber and Play-doh puppets that look like something from a semi-retarded pre-school art class. Then add some screeching, Yngwie Malmstein-esquire, melodic-metal guitar solos stuff that is way too loud and lasts way too long. The overall film is absolutely awful and makes "Feeders" look like "Rashomon." Its one of the worst movies I've ever seen, with every quantifiable metric spiraling dismally downward, much like a waterlogged turd in the perpetual, slow whirlpool of a broken Rest Stop toilet. Still, though, a film like "Actium Maximus" is not to be missed by the bad movie conesseuirs out there, even if only by looking up clips on YouTube or someplace. This movie is a bit of an eye opener, if you can stomach the ride. I think this director may be mentally ill, though, which is a bit debasing. Watching him discuss the project, you get the sense that he truly believes that he's created something wonderful. I guess he's the "Star Wars kid" of gonzo filmmakers. What a mess. :-)

This movie is awful, I'm SORRY. I bought this to get Star Worms, and actually expected this to be better after how disappointed I was in Star Worms. Oh just kidding, turns out this is the worst movie I've ever seen. The acting is garbage, not that there really is any, and the main character is a big stupid box who gets attacked by like, stuff or something. I can't really tell. The special effects are so bad that you can't even see the warring dinosaurs, which by the way do not war, but just stand and kind of move their mouths, or whatever those things are. The movie is a headache. It's very obvious the director is trying to establish a universe. Hahahahahahahaha... Really, this movie is just abominable, even by Troma's standards. The only good thing I can say about it is that it's got a Lloyd Kaufman intro, as he tricks us yet again into watching something that isn't fit for consumption.

The DVD case reads, "With an intricate storyline not seen since The Dark Crystal, Actium Maximus is an ambitious and truly independent science fiction epic." Technically, that statement is true. The movie's ambitious, alright. Unfortunately, it's so independent that the budget is non-existent and the film ends up shooting itself in the scaly foot. The craftsmanship in Mark Hicks' sculpted landscapes and puppet armatures are diluted by the bad video quality and poor digital matting. Director Hicks, as Omni-Turor Axezun, looks like a jaundiced TV's Frank and delivers his lines with a mush mouth. Extras in rubber masks and robes wander around in front of a crudely pixel-lated blue screen. The robot dictator's dialog is delivered through clever subtitles that are in dire need of an editor and spellcheck. Thankfully, a few aspects of the film are purely positive:The music is cheerfully cheesy and boisterous. The occasional in-film newscasts slip in sharp social commentary about a non-existent society. And Axezun's lady friend certainly knows how to wear vinyl. With more money this might've been a minor classic, as it stands Actium Maximus is a noble failure.