What a waste of my time!!!

ridiculous rating

I didn’t really have many expectations going into the movie (good or bad), but I actually really enjoyed it. I really liked the characters and the banter between them.

There's a more than satisfactory amount of boom-boom in the movie's trim running time.

Rowdy Welles (Davi) is a badass named Rowdy Welles. He's a flying ace that loves planes as much as he loves women, cigars, and being named Rowdy Welles. When a suit at the CIA named Althorp (Gazzara) frames Rowdy for murder, Rowdy has no choice but to do his bidding. (i.e. the "just do this one job for me" plot which may seem familiar.) His mission is to travel to Russia, and stop the nuclear ambitions of a baddie named Lothar Krasna (Godunov). His name is as evil-sounding as Rowdy's is awesome. While there, he gets up to all sorts of intrigue and shenanigans, many of which involve the beautiful Mikaela (Harris). Will Rowdy stop the entire Russian nuclear program with only a toy car? Find out today! 1995 was an amazing year for the great Robert Davi. He starred in this, No Contest (1995), Showgirls (1995), and one of his career best, The Dangerous (1995), among even more film and TV appearances. It's easy to forget these days that Davi was a big star, or at least poised to be one, in the DTV world. Regardless of his status, we remain staunch Davi fans, and while it was only natural not everything he did in '95 would be as good as The Dangerous, Davi still carries the movie, and looks cool smoking a cigar and/or shooting people in slow motion.While some of the weirder elements kept The Dangerous afloat and made it memorable, The Dogfighters is merely a "guy in a foreign land beating up foreigners" movie that we've all seen before. But at least it's not a plane slog like we thought it was going to be. Granted, the beginning-and-end brackets of flying scenes go on too long (as do many other scenes), but we do have one of the better exploding helicopters in recent memory, so there's that. Plus, Godunov is just not that threatening in this movie. Yes, he does have the typical long blonde hair that alerts us that he is a typical Eurotrash baddie, but he's busy dancing (they made sure to give him at least one unnecessary dance scene), and not putting Rowdy's family at risk, or anything like that.History-wise, The Dogfighters is a movie trapped between the 80's and 90's. For example, there are references to "finishing the job" with Saddam Hussein and the first Gulf War, and another beaming picture of Bill Clinton firmly placed on the wall (though not as prominent as it was in Terminal Rush), yet the Russians are still the villains, just like they were in the 80's. Fascinatingly, Ben Gazzara makes a reference to having "enough explosives to take down the World Trade Center". While the first WTC bombing had already occurred, still that should be enough to ban the airing of this movie on TV, along with the forbidden episodes of Seinfeld and The Simpsons. (Interesting connection to that: Dan Castellaneta is credited with "additional voices" on this movie).But really, this movie is just dumb, and loses energy a lot. It needed more action, and lacked a sense of urgency or danger. Plus Godunov looks like, and is about as threatening as, Gerard Depardieu. Also the music by the normally-great Jeff "Skunk" Baxter seems listless and noodly, not driving and action-oriented like it should be. The "not theater-ready" look to the project inevitably alienated potential renters, who were spoilt for choice during the height of the video store era. Thus, fairly or unfairly, The Dogfighters is sadly condemned to the lost video store shelf of history.

To give you an idea of how impatient I was to watch this movie : between the moment I discovered it existed and the moment I completed my order, no more than 15 seconds elapsed. I couldn't believe nobody had told me there was a film with Robert Davi and Alexander Godunov, two actors I worship, in the leading parts. It was Godunov's last film.The story is rather simple : Robert Davi is a soldier who is framed for murder by the CIA boss. He is forced to go to Moravash (what a silly name for an imaginary Eastern European country!) to destroy Lothar Krasna's nuclear processing plant.I found the pace of this movie awful, with scenes that dragged on and on. The music was unbearable at times (think nails on blackboard). The technology was laughable (the nuclear plant is destroyed by a toy car - they didn't even bother to make it look like something technologically more advanced!). However I had a really nice time watching it.Parts of it fell into the "so bad it's good" category. For instance, from the moment when Davi enters the plant, you can see the same shade of blue paint everywhere, and I mean everywhere : the truck, the walls, the railings, the door... which makes me think the owner of the plant allowed them to film there in exchange for a little refurbishment. There was a lot of gratuitous nudity. Davi has a look at the women's changing room for no reason whatsoever. Lara Harris, the leading lady, looks great naked (and I'm a straight woman).The ending was ridiculous, with the tiniest nuclear explosion ever (it manages to destroy the plant and the bad guy's plane, but not the good guy's one). But Davi's and Godunov's performances somehow hold the film together and make it really enjoyable. I will watch it again.