An Exercise In Nonsense

Mostly, the movie is committed to the value of a good time.

It’s fine. It's literally the definition of a fine movie. You’ve seen it before, you know every beat and outcome before the characters even do. Only question is how much escapism you’re looking for.

One of the worst ways to make a cult movie is to set out to make a cult movie.

This was close to being a great sex-comedy, but just strayed a little too close to the good taste line to really be one of the all-timers. You'd think a movie about bikini's would have more nudity, but it was fairly restrained in that regard and even the ending that should have been loaded with it was cut short. Not enough over the top gags or hijinks but it did have the whole "we need to make money in a week to save the store" plot line. Fun and slight, but needed an injection of raunch to really set sail.

Wow, I have never heard of this until recently stumbling across it in a $2 bin of used VHS videos. Bruce Greenwood shows more flair here than he ever did in Double Jeopardy. what a cool film, especially the finale where all the bikini's that a mass of running girls are wearing, dissolve. If thats not good enough what about the two way mirrors in the shop itself, straight out of Porky's. Mr. Remington has a few good one liners, but it's all about Tod, Bruce Greenwood, is the brains behind his brother's nerdyness. Why this Canadian actor wearing a sailors hat and an unbuttoned shirt is appealing to me, I don't know, but he's choice in the role. As soon as you listen to the soundtrack you may think they are reject songs from Valley Girl, but there are some really good music. Better than 'Welcome to 18'. In Australia it was just called 'The Bikini Shop' and got a theatrical release, when as a teenybopper, gave it 10/10 too. See it.

You probably know what you are getting if you decide to see this one. It's another mid-80's teen sex comedy with a silly plot, bad acting, ridiculous situations, and gratuitous nudity. If you grew up during this era, the music and fashion will take you back. Two brothers inherit a bikini shop. Todd is the laid-back party dude who wants to keep the shop and let the good times roll. The other brother is a straight-laced finance major who just wants to sell it and get back to his career. Eventually they join forces to save the store and presumably grow old together in the Malibu sun. Some of the positives of this movie: I really felt like the characters were having fun, and it looked like it would be a nice place to hang out (and I already live in southwest Florida). Also, the simplistic story drew me in enough that I was happy for the business-minded brother when he finally dumped his sexist caricature of a finance and got with the sweet, gentle bikini sales girl. It's all very predictable and not really much to look at (nobody looks good with 80's hair), but as I said, if you enjoy movies like Private Resort, Revenge of the Nerds, and Porkys, you won't really care.

"Malibu" Bikini Shop is a Sex Comedy that manages to be neither comedic nor sexy. Well, maybe a little bit sexy. But the scenes of Barbara Horan in the hot tub are hardly worth enduring terrible music, embarrassing fashions (sadly, the bikinis are some of the biggest violators) a thin, implausible, wholly predictable plot, and characters that are all one dimensional caricatures. This isn't even a "so bad it's good" kind of bad. It's more of a "sixth graders write better than this" bad and "how the hell can a movie about girls wearing bikinis be so unenjoyably" bad. Imagine an Elvis movie and the depth of plot those had, only instead of Elvis you have a pair of B-cups thrown in every 18 minutes or so and you have a pretty good idea of what you're in for with Bikini shop.I realize this isn't exactly Masterpiece Theater, but if you want to see skin (which is why 99% of people would even consider watching this) it would be so much more efficient to just look at a Playboy or even an episode of Rock of Love. The girls in this movie, while young and fit, are saddled with horrendous wardrobes and situations. Visually, none of them really rate higher than about a 7 out of 10.If you're still reading this review, you may be a Trekkie interested in Bruce Greenwood's early work and you're on the fence about if it's worth the time. Be warned: are you prepared for Bruce in a belly shirt? I advise having your thumb locked and ready on the ff/scan button. Life is too short to waste watching trash like this, and when I write "trash," I don't mean in a morally reprehensible way. I mean in a lazy, lowest common denominator kind of way.Bonus points to anyone who figures out why "Malibu" is sometimes attached to this title when the movie hints that it takes place in Santa Monica.