Thanks for the memories!

Excellent but underrated film

what a terribly boring film. I'm sorry but this is absolutely not deserving of best picture and will be forgotten quickly. Entertaining and engaging cinema? No. Nothing performances with flat faces and mistaking silence for subtlety.

There are moments in this movie where the great movie it could've been peek out... They're fleeting, here, but they're worth savoring, and they happen often enough to make it worth your while.

this why I hate most of Germany's films, they rarely make a good movie and this is no exception. the dubbing was rushed, the history is completely inaccurate, the characters are mediocre and under developed, the animation is lazy I mean I've seen better animation in a Saturday Morning Cartoon, every actor is miscast and there is some very disturbing visuals for a children's movie like hanging and pulling a spyglass out of a mans privates. Good grief Uwe Boll was bad enough without more German filmmakers bleeding the industry, in fact the only good movie that Germany ever made was Metropolis in 1929. so do yourself a favor and read a book instead and avoid this movie.

I have a strong feeling that this is Germany's way of getting back at America for past discrepancies, of which I will not go too deeply into, but either way, this film is so bad, so utterly putrid, it falls straight off the edge of my bad movie category and into the darkest depths of the oblivion. Let me explain.First, for a story about how Christopher Columbus produced his theory on how the World was round and how new worlds may exist beyond the horizon, it seems to have absolutely nothing to do with that. Instead a bookworm who just magically happens to know everything tells Columbus that the World is round, which sends him to the King and Queen with his theory. Oh and apparently the Queen has a crush on him, but that's another story. In the first few minutes, you'd probably have noticed this film suffers from the same problem as Felix the Cat, it cannot be silent for 1 miserable second. There's always talking, always some noise of some description that is almost the equivalent of some guy yelling at you because he thinks that if he's silent he won't be garnering 100% of your attention.So anyway, Christopher Columbus is given his ship and told to find the New World. Meanwhile, the story takes another divergence into the realms of stupidity as the Bookworm comes across a firefly trapped in a Chandelier, it turns out she is a Princess who possesses a magic light that is wanted by a Swarm Lord. Think we're getting a bit off topic at this point? According to the idiots who wrote this we're retracing the moments of history step by delirious step. Anyway, the Swarm Lord comes out of nowhere and steals her away to his land across the sea, which just so happens to be the USA.The next day they set sail and the bookworm tells Columbus about his predicament, which somehow Columbus believes and decides to change the goal from discovering the New World to an elaborate Rescue Mission of a bug he probably doesn't even know exists, but for some reason he is just so obliviously accepting of all these inconceivable facts. As the voyage continues, and after a ridiculous dream sequence which could only be thought up by someone with an unknown mental illness, the crew lose faith in his judgement and try to hang him. But as timing would have it, the ship strikes on the shores of the New World just as he's being hung out to dry.Wearing nothing but his boxers, Columbus, the bookworm and their new found talking Beaver friend go to a nearby Aztec temple that is controlled by the Swarm Lord and they attempt to break the Princess free. Through what can only be described as a collection of idiotic antics by the protagonists, they manage to destroy the temple and save the Princess, only to be confronted by the natives. The natives were in fact honouring the Swarm Lord themselves and so they are eternally grateful to Columbus for destroying it. And thus the story ends.There you have it folks, the most idiotic representation of the discovery of America. This and a collection of terrible editing, worthless scriptwriting, inconsistent animation and more noise than a concert by Queen, makes this film genuine in the sense that it is so bad.Personally, I think Alvin Seville from Alvin and the Chipmunks had a more believable story that Columbus did in fact cross the Atlantic aboard the Titanic before falling off the edge of the Earth only to find he didn't fall off the edge of the Earth and his soul purpose for finding the New World was to flog T-shirts. You know, I can actually relate to a story like that, because it is told in a way you can actually get your head around, unlike the garbage that was made for film that just takes history and drowns it in its own bathtub.

What was Germany thinking? I mean, seriously, WHAT WAS Germany THINKING?! Now, I may not be so hot on history, but I've heard that in 1492, Columbus sailed to America and killed all the Tainos who did no harm but hunt for food. Now I know what you're thinking: that part about Columbus killing Tainos wasn't true! But that would be nothing compared to this movie. First of all, it's too noisy! The Germans behind this film feared that if the film stopped being cartoon-like and bouncy, it would lose kids' attention. That, however, is not true. Second, it has the same problem as the Titanic Animated trilogy: being historically incorrect! Why would a woodworm know that the Earth is round? What is he, an insect-like Albert Einstein?! I read the history textbooks about Columbus and the discovery of America, but I don't see any mention of talking wood-worms, evil insects, and a "befuddled, kid-friendly version" of Columbus himself! Third, the animation. I think I'm starting to notice that the animation was done by the same idiots who made that obnoxious Felix the Cat movie and the god-awful Legend of Zelda CD-i games. Again, what was Germany thinking about making this movie?! Fourth, the dream sequence. WHOA! Did Columbus pulled a telescope out of his cojones?! This is supposed to be a kid's movie, not Last Cannibal World! If Germany wanted to make a cartoon movie that is not historically correct, why don't they make an animated musical about Germany during Hitler's reign and portray Hitler as a bouncy, fun-loving kid friendly leader who was tricked by a talking mouse into thinking that the Jews are bloodthirsty monsters and must be converted by turning them into statues and then use a magic wand to turn them into Nazi soldiers with big smiles on their faces?! Yeah, let's see them make a historically incorrect cartoon movie based on that one!

I have given this film five stars because it is worthy of both a one and a ten.It deserves one star because it is one of the lowest, most ill-conceived, pathetic films I have ever seen. But it deserves ten stars as well. Because in being one of the sloppiest and most absurd films ever made, it is certainly one of the most comical.I had remembered this film from my childhood, but after viewing it at the age of seventeen, I gained an entirely new perspective of this film. I purchased it with the interest that it might bring back memories. But it is now a gem in my collection, one of the most entertaining motion pictures I have ever witnessed or ever will witness.It would be a misconception to clump this film with other films labeled 'so-bad-it's-good.' Rather, what makes this film enjoyable is its utter preposterousness; it crosses the boundaries of a typical children's film into the bizarre and surreal. One user hit the nail on the head when commenting on this film, saying that the viewer is led to ask the question: 'Why?' The dialogue is clumsily splattered all over the place. Every other line is something that could easily be thrown out, some of which touch into some realm of absurdity never to be revisited throughout the film. At other times, entire segments of dialogue seem completely unnecessary. It seems as if the voice actors were not only poorly improvising the script, but were also clueless as to what the story involved.The characters are completely senseless. Columbus, in particular, is hardly a character at all. Though they initially portray him as an ambitious explorer, the character gradually goes downhill as the film progresses, until the end of the film, at which point he has transformed into a raving madman running around in his underwear. 'Gold! Gold!!' he shouts gluttonously, his eyeballs shifting into all sorts of phantasmagorical shapes. One moment, he is clambering through the forest in search of gold, and the next moment he is paralyzed with fear, offering the other characters meaningless quips and puns. Meanwhile, he scrambles through the forest screeching maniacally, adding nothing to the plot save for absolute chaos.Generally, the film seems to dismantle as it goes on. The events within the plot grow more useless with every scene. By the fiery climax of the movie, it has all been reduced to pitiful bedlam. All that can be heard are the angry bellows from the evil 'Swarm Lord,' and the incessant wailing of Columbus. While the film seems to draw toward the dramatic demise of the evil 'Swarm Lord,' it is all ended when Columbus plummets down and inadvertently squashes the great swarm of bugs with his 'gold.' A squishing noise is heard; 'Hey! You squished the Swarm Lord!' says 'Bob the Beaver' in his Eeyore-like voice, since this abrupt turn of events would be completely undecipherable without such an explanation. The conflict has ended suddenly and unexpectedly.Without a doubt, it is a ridiculously poorly-made film, but those who are fond of absurdity are sure to love it. Moments of senselessness amount to great moments of comedy. Therefore, I recommend this film to anyone who is not a small child, and who feels ready for some laughs. If you begin to watch this film, and it does not seem promising at first, all you have to do is wait; watch as a seemingly innocent children's movie turns into a boiling pot of mayhem.