Really Surprised!

How sad is this?

Yo, there's no way for me to review this film without saying, take your *insert ethnicity + "ass" here* to see this film,like now. You have to see it in order to know what you're really messing with.

It's simply great fun, a winsome film and an occasionally over-the-top luxury fantasy that never flags.

Average Chorizo/ S.W. about a relentless and exciting dangerous mission that a motley trio pulls off in Mexican territory and set against spectacular and ordinary scenery of Almeria . The risked assignment is set against strong environment , violent attacks by Mexican bands , double-crosses and hazardous trails . It will be a long and dangerous pursuit with continuous risks , killings , shootouts and silly fights . This typical Western displays stirring adventures , shootouts , humor with tongue-in-cheek , riding pursuits and is pretty amusing . It deals with a misfit group in search of millions of dollars in gold that have been stolen during American Civil War . A group of conscripted convicts formed by three condemned , already destined for death row, are drafted to go on a risked mission and attempt to recapture a rebel Major called Lloyd (Gerard Herter of The Big Gundown) . They must carry out the objective to take a wagon-load of gold and with the understanding that if the Confederate don't murder them, the Union Army won't, either . A two-fisted Confederate Lieutenant named Logan (Milo Quesada of Django kill) and the ambitious drifters , join forces to retrieve an impressive lot of dollars in gold bars taken from Union banks and destined to buy weapons to Mexican Army for Confederation . In the hands of hardboiled director Nando Cicero and a tough-as-leather cast , that's all the plot that's needed to make one rip-roaring Spaghetti Western flick . The story is displayed in ¨Dirty dozen ¨ style with usual crime-minded characters including a rustler named Fidel Ramirez (Jorge Martin) , a troublesome ex-priest with penchant dynamite named Steele Downey (George Hilton) and a Bank-robber named Chattanooga Jim (Edd Byrnes) . The first half of the film allows the colorful cast of character actors to have their fun as they get their tails whipped into shape and develop shaky relationship . The final part is all action , as the trio wreck havoc and then run for their lives and pursued by the band of Alacran (Jose Bodalo of Django) who robs the gold for his strange Mexican family . The message here isn't that war is hell , rather, it seems to be : war can be a hell of a good time if you've got nothing to lose . It's an exciting SW with breathtaking showdown between the protagonists and their enemies full of explosions , machine gun , deaths and fights in Terence Hill-Bud Spencer style . The picture blends violence , humor , struggles , high body-count and is quite entertaining . There is plenty of action in the movie , guaranteeing a shootout or stunt every few minutes . The film is starred by a Spaghetti all-star-cast as the Spanish George (Jorge) Martin who worked much for Alfonso Balcazar's factory such as ¨Clint the strange¨, ¨The return the Clint¨, ¨Oeste Nevada Joe¨, Thompson 1880¨ , ¨Taste of killing¨, ¨A pistol for Ringo and ¨¨The return of Ringo¨ ; the Uruguay-born George Hilton who was a Spaghetti first-star such as ¨ Sartana no perdone¨ , ¨Go kill and come back¨ , ¨Kitosch¨ , ¨They call me Alleluja¨ , ¨Ruthless four¨ , ¨Alleluja for Django¨ , and also played successful Giallio as ¨The strange vice of Mrs Wardh¨ , ¨The scorpion's tale¨, ¨All colors of the dark¨ , ¨My deal Killer¨ ; and Edd Byrnes , Kookie , who starred two Spaghetti for Enzo G Castell as ¨Seven Winchester for a massacre¨ and ¨Go kill and come back¨ with George Hilton . Gerard Herter as a cruelly baddie role as confederate officer is terrific , subsequently the would play similar roles in other Spaghettis . There are many good technicians and nice assistant direction and acceptable production design with an atmospheric scenario plenty of barren outdoors , dirty and rocky landscapes and a fine set on the final scenes . The musician Carlos Pes composes a nice Spaghetti soundtrack and well conducted ; it's full of enjoyable sounds and emotive score with perdurable leitmotif . The film is well shot in 'Splugas city' (Splugas De Llobregat , Barcelona) , a location built by Alfonso Balcazar where were filmed a lot of ¨Butifarra Western¨ and of course , Almeria, Spain and Roman studios called Elios . Mediocre cinematography by habitual Francisco Marin who photographed loads of 'Gazpacho' Westerns , it's urgent and necessary a correct remastering because of the film-copy is washed-up . Fernando Cicero's so-so direction is regularly crafted , here he's cynical and humorous and inclined toward violence as well as too much action especially on its ending part .

The thoroughly conventional Spaghetti western "Red Blood, Yellow Gold" appropriates the plot of "The Secret Invasion," where criminals received a second chance to prove their mettle, and grafts it onto an American Civil War western about the search for stolen Confederate gold. "Last of the Badmen" director Nando Cicero and a quartet of scenarists, Jaime Jesús Balcázar of "Sartana Does Not Forgive," José Antonio de la Loma of "Seven Magnificent Guns," Enzo Dell'Aquila of "7 Women for the MacGregors," and Roberto Gianviti of "Seven Slaves Against the World" stock this oater with all the usual elements that European westerns have. They inserted a "Fistful of Dollars" type scene where the Southern traitors mow down their own soldiers with a Gatling gun. A similar scene occurred in Gianfranco Parolini's "Adios, Sabata" when the Austrians shot their own men down. Our villain, Confederate Major Lloyd (Gérard Herter of "The Big Gundown") is hopelessly treacherous, and he purloins the gold ingots from his own army. The Confederacy dispatches three thieves with an officer in charge to recover the gold. George Hilton, George Martin, and American actor Edd Byrnes headline this violent but standard-issue sagebrusher. As usual for these gritty horse operas, life is cheap and "Red Blood, Yellow Gold" boasts a double-digit body count. "Tepepa" lenser Francisco Martin captured all the abrasive, larger-than-life, tongue-in-cheek shenanigans on crisp Eastman Color film and his widescreen pictorial compositions add a touch of class to this low-budget western. "Red Blood, Yellow Gold" opens as Yankee troops withdraw hastily from a western town as the Confederates recapture the town. Our three heroes, Steel Downey (George Hilton of "Dead for A Dollar"), Fidel Ramirez (George Martin of "Ballad of Death Valley"), and Chattanooga Jim (Edd Byrnes of "Payment in Blood"), don't waste any time once they enter town. They make straight away to the local bank and Steel blows the vault with dynamite. Later, they steal a wagon of munitions and sell them for gold to Union troops. Unfortunately for the Union troops, they don't know that Steel has booby-trapped the wagon. No sooner do the Union soldiers ride away with the cargo of rifles and bullets than it blows up and kills them all. No sooner have our unscrupulous heroes celebrated their triumph over the enemy than their own people arrest and sentence them to perish in front of a firing squad. Piously, Steel prays aloud as the soldiers prepare to shoot them. "Omnipotent and merciful God, perhaps we don't deserve much," he observes, "But if you would give us a small sign of your benevolence." The typical Spaghetti western resembles a melodrama because the Europeans liked to spring reversals and surprises on audiences. Despite the ill-feeling held toward these thieves, bald-headed, cigar-puffing Confederate General Sibley spares their lives. One of Sibley's most trusted adjutants, Major Lloyd, has hijacked a wagon load of gold and he has struck out for Mexico with it. "As soldiers, you're just common thieves," Sibley points out, "but as thieves, you can honorably serve the cause of the South." Lieutenant Logan (Milo Quesada of "Captain Apache") doesn't think much of Sibley's plans, but he agrees to ride with the three thieves. Sibley inventories the useful characteristics of each man. He knows that Steel is a defrocked priest who had a tendency to use dynamite against those who blasphemed against the Lord. Chattanooga Jim earned his nickname because he robbed a Chattanooga bank all alone. Jim explains the robbery was hardly daring because security at the bank was no negligible. Meanwhile, Fidel is an expert horse thief. Our heroes ride out and visit a saloon where they slug it out with a group of Mexicans. Afterward, they set out on horseback and find a farm where a cow is crying because it hasn't been milked. While Fidel checks out the stable, Steel and Chattanooga inspect the house and find dead, blood-splattered corpses littering the premises. The men have been shot to dead and their clothes have been removed. They find evidence that Major Lloyd and his renegades are the killers. No sooner have they established this fact than the daughter of the family, Annie (Mónica Randall of "Red Sun") rides into the ranch with a rifle. She is appalled at the sight of the dead bodies and accuses our heroes of the massacre. They bind and gag her and set off to cut off Major Lloyd as his men and he ride into a canyon. Naturally, Steel devises a plan to trap them with his explosives. Reluctantly, our heroes have brought along Annie and she causes no end of trouble. First, she cuts her ropes. Second, she alerts Major Lloyd about the impending danger of entering the pass. Annie warns them they will be murdered, until Fidel shoots one of Lloyd's men. Annie recognizes the killer's clothes as her dead father's apparel. Steel, Fidel, and Chattanooga entrust Annie to Lieutenant Logan's care and circle behind Lloyd. Logan explains to Annie she had better start helping them thwart Lloyd if she wants to survive. "Red Blood, Yellow Gold" grows more complicated. A Mexican bandit, Pietro Primero (José Bódalo of "Django"), and his peasant army steal the gold from Lloyd. While Pietro and his people celebrate their good fortune, our heroes find the ingots about the same time as Lloyd and his men. A donnybrook ensues between them and somebody accidentally shoots their gun. Pietro's men come out slinging lead. Eventually, our heroes recover the gold from Pietro. They wind up blowing up Lloyd and his gunmen and later Pietro. Just as they are about to ride off into the sunset, General Sibley and the Confederate cavalry appear and take the gold off their hands. Sibley wants them out of the territory pronto. He takes the gold to Mexico. At the exchange, as a last minute reversal, our heroes reappear in sombreros and hijack the gold from the Mexicans. "Red Blood, Yellow Gold" qualifies as shallow but entertaining tale.

Dynamite-loving ex-priest George Hilton, Edd "Kookie" Byrnes, and Mexican horse thief/whisperer George Martin both fight for and steal from the Confederacy. About to be executed for their thieving ways, they're given a reprieve in order to track down a renegade officer who killed some of his fellow soldiers and made off with a wagon full of gold and a Gattling gun.A fast-paced, rowdy adventure, this above average Italian western is a load of fun, especially George Hilton's character, who gleefully mixes piousness with his passion for blowing things (and people!) up. Hilton is truly a spaghetti western treasure!Things stay pretty light-hearted throughout, with a good mixture of tongue-in-cheek comedy, plot-twists, and great action sequences. I don't know about everyone else, but I thought it was pretty cool!It is claimed that one of the producers on this was a young Sylvester Stallone, a claim that seems a bit fishy. You never can tell though. If he did, he should have acted in it too. It sure would have been neat to see him before he was a star, shooting a six-gun in the Spanish desert!

This 1967 spaghetti western features former teen idol Edd "Kookie" Byrnes and Italian western favorite George Hilton. The somewhat confusing plot involves hired gun mercenaries doing battle with a series of would-be tough guys and their corrupt leader.Byrnes starred in several foreign westerns during this period of his career, with varying degrees of success. Several in 1967 paired Byrnes with Hilton. These were entertaining, though hardly memorable.Fans of the spaghetti genre will find this one interesting, with both lead actors doing their best to raise the level of the film a few notches. Others beware, this one can be a little hard to follow at times!