Such a frustrating disappointment

an ambitious but ultimately ineffective debut endeavor.

There are moments that feel comical, some horrific, and some downright inspiring but the tonal shifts hardly matter as the end results come to a film that's perfect for this time.

Worth seeing just to witness how winsome it is.

Originally called "Krocodylus" and released in the US in 2001, "Blood Surf" is the wackiest crocogator flick I've seen. The plot throws in everything but the kitchen sink in its attempt to entertain; and the croc, when finally seen, is laughably fake-looking.The pitch-meeting for "Blood Surf" possibly went something like this: The pitcher excitedly describes the basic plot: "A couple of radical surfers go to a tropical island known for shark attacks so they can capture themselves on camera 'blood surfing' -- cutting their feet to bleed and wildly surfing the shark-infested waters." When he gets a silent reaction, he adds, "Okay, um, let's see... then this huge saltwater croc comes out of nowhere and starts eating the sharks... and proceeds to chase the surfers on to the island." More disinterest. "Where they encounter some Rambo-esque militarists and jungle booby traps a la Indiana Jones." More solemn looks. "In addition, the camera operator is a hot Aussie chick and there's also a hot island girl." An eyebrow or two stirs. "And one surfer has sex in the surf with the island chick and later discovers she's underaged." Eye's brighten. "On top of all that there's a Captain Ahab-like character who's hell-bent on killing the croc." More interest. "Who has a skinny girlfriend with a flat chest which she exposes every 10 minutes." Smiling faces. "She has a cool dance sequence at the pub-on-the-beach where the dudes ogle in fascination, even though she's really not sexy at all." Now the pitcher has their undivided attention. "And she and 'Ahab' have sex on the dock while she's bent over the railing." Enthralled. "And we'll throw in a score that sounds like the Beach Boys meets the 60's Batman theme." "What about the ending?" they ask. "The climatic stand-off will take place in some ancient ruins a la 'Congo'." Now totally hooked. "And even though the croc will be laughable and cheap we'll throw in a couple of 'Jaws' homages." The deal is made.That's pretty much "Blood Surf" in all it's low-budget, odd, irrational non-glory. But, hey, at least it tries hard to be entertaining.As for the un-sexy, too-skinny, flat-chested girl who keeps exposing herself and trying to be alluring, I couldn't help wonder why the filmmakers added her into the mix. It's really inexplicable since, although she's sorta pretty, she just doesn't cut it, if you know what I mean. But then it hit me that they already have the conventional hot babe (Kate Fischer) and the hot island girl (Maureen Larrazabal), so the creators were evidently giving a nod to all the skinny, non-curvy ladies out there. Not every woman can be Kim Kardashian, after all, but that doesn't mean they shouldn't be given their honored due now and then, kind of like scraps from the table. Just joking. Hey, I'm sure there are some guys out there who find the skinny girl sexy. It takes all kinds to make a world. (And I'm not at all mocking flat-chested women since I don't mind women with small or no breasts, I even used to be involved with one; I'm talking about nigh-anorexic women with zero curves).The film runs 84 minutes and was shot in the Philipines.BOTTOM LINE: "Blood Surf" is not a good movie in any way, shape or form, but you gotta respect its exuberant attempts to amuse.GRADE: C- (but with solid entertainment value, IF you're in the right mode)

We saw this wonderful movie through our free dish downloadable content. I say this because I am happy to day I did not spend even a dollar to rent it.The story is absolutely ridiculous. I mean come on.... chumming for sharks to surf with? Real;y?? THere are some beautiful locations but that is about all this movie has to offer. There are a few disjointed love scenes that are totally unrealistic and pointless to the story...We love the "giant" animal flicks and most are good enough to endure but this one does not live up to the genre.Save your time and pick another flick, this one isn't it.....

"Blood Surf" (a.k.a. "Krocodylus") is one of those movies that you root for when you hear a plot description, because you are really hoping that this one will work. The basic idea is quite interesting. A new form of stunt television work, called Blood Surf, is created, in which surfers ride their boards through shark-infested waters. But instead of being chomped on by sharks, as we'd initially expect, they are hounded by a ferocious saltwater crocodile. Now that is a plot that we really want to go for. It sounds like a recipe for an enjoyable film. But alas, "Blood Surf" slam-dunks itself right into some foul water and sinks into the abysses because it suffers from the cinematic equivalence of schizophrenia. It has no idea what it should be, or more important, what it even wants to be.A full hour ellipses by the time we really start on the plot with the crocodile and by that time, the tone of the movie has undergone a one hundred-eighty-degree turn. It's at this point that we realize that "Blood Surf" is really supposed be a comedy rather than a straight shocker. So naturally, we would expect the first two-thirds to be the funny, whimsical bits and the last part straight, gruesome, and serious in mind.We would be wrong.Instead, writers Sam Bernard and Robert L. Levy decided to idiotically reverse this. If the entire movie was to be funny, you wouldn't be able to tell from the first hour. It's all down in tone and imitates realism. Then, when the crocodile appears it throws up some of the most ridiculously stupid and unbelievable twists intended to spawn laughter. For example, the crocodile chases our heroes on land but won't chase them through a river because supposedly there's chocolate plants in the water and "salties hate them!" A character quips, "I guess that's what you call croc-teasing" and the scene ends quickly, leaving us with our mouths agape. Only no sound is coming out. But the movie's ultimately lowest point is a juxtaposition of an attack by the crocodile and the lamest, most pathetic, most pointless sex scene possibly in movie history. I have griped about that cheap gimmick many times, but this is the one time where I really think it becomes almost criminally stupid.There are so many good ideas thrown shamefully to waste. The idea of blood surfing and then encountering a crocodile. The characters being captured by pirates. I was even willing to buy the redundant and monotonous subplot about the enraged, crusty sea captain wanting to hunt down the crocodile for revenge. Those are good ideas that are not developed well and this only increased by disdain for the movie. Performances, in general, are stiff but not awful, with only Ducan Regehr's being good enough to really be labeled acting. So lack of real talent in the cast does strike against it when it tries to be funny."Blood Surf" was directed by James D.R. Hickox, who made the pleasingly entertaining "Sabretooth" in 2002, so I was really hoping that this feature was going to realize its potential. But because of its lack of knowledge about itself and what it should go for, or what it even wants to go for, the picture collapses really hard and really fast. That great critic Gene Siskel once said that people should not remake classics, but bad movies, because any subject could be done well.Let's utilize his philosophy here.

RE: "Blood Surf": Could someone PLEASE let me know: the filipina Maureen Larrazabal, whose character Lemmey (is that spelled correctly?), the 17-year old native girl who makes love to the blond guy in the lagoon; when she gets attacked by the croc, it that scene actually shown in the movie, or is the audience supposed to just figure it out????? And if it is shown, what exactly happens? Is she nude? Someone write a response. I was wondering about purchasing this movie on DVD, mainly for the women, who are sexy (I heard) I found the film for $5.99 so I thought it is not that bad of a price! Anyway, could someone PLEASE respond to my question! Please! Thank you. -PAUL November 2, 2004 - Tues. DON'T FORGET TO VOTE TODAY!