Brilliant and touching

The film makes a home in your brain and the only cure is to see it again.

Unshakable, witty and deeply felt, the film will be paying emotional dividends for a long, long time.

Through painfully honest and emotional moments, the movie becomes irresistibly relatable

You know what's worse than having to defend your gold mine from a bunch of bandits? Having your wife right by your side during the gun battle, nagging on about what a mess you've made of things and how it's all your fault and how life was better back East. Sure, this mine guy kills all the bandits, but I got the feeling that when he blew himself up and got trapped under a pile of crap it wasn't totally by accident.It gave him an opportunity to give his wife the old 'I'm trapped under here - better go and get some help from that town - you know, the one that's two days away, and before you go can you fetch me that huge bottle of whiskey, my Razzle collection, and a box of Kleenex? Cheers Love,' spiel that we've all used many a time.I'm trying to write this review, but my six year old son has implemented a new torture device in order to prolong the 'going to bed' ceremony. Now he complains that his arse is incredibly itchy. It doesn't itch when he's watching television, DVDs, or playing video games. It doesn't itch when he's out playing, or swimming. It only itches when it's time for bed. I think this may be some sort of unique medical condition. It doesn't itch in the morning either. I'm going mad.So the wife and her itchy arse hightails it over to the town of Itchy Con Arso, where a drunken soldier agrees to help wife once he hears the words 'Gold' 'Mine' and 'Itchy'. He needs some other guys to pad out the running time however, so we also end up with the potential rapist, the other potential racist, the guy who might rape wife lady, and the other guy who has an itchy arse and no time for such shenanigans.Also there's a bandit in the area who wants to kill them all, and then we get all the usual stuff with the double crosses, gunfights, attempted rapes and itchy arses. There's no dusty town in this one - the backgrounds are all crumbling hills, rotten old houses and such like. Find Arse Place to Scratch is good enough for me!

Released in 1968-69, but not in the USA until 1971, "Find a Place to Die" is a Spaghetti Western starring Jeffrey Hunter as a dishonored ex-officer drinking his woes away in Mexico when a beautiful woman (Pascale Petit) hires him and several others to save her husband and their gold mine claim from a band of local bandits. Daniela Giordano is on hand as the beautiful Juanita at the cantina. The plot is obviously borrowed (or, more accurately, ripped off) from 1954's "Garden of Evil" and combines it with a pensive Spaghetti Western flavor, lacking the goofiness and moral hollowness of, say, 1966's "The Good, the Bad and the Ugly." The melancholy is heightened by a moving song Juanita sings at the cantina in the first act; the tune is reminiscent of Jerry Goldsmith's excellent acoustic piece for 1970's "Rio Lobo." Too bad Giordano (as Juanita) didn't have a bigger role, but it's big enough.There are several other things that propel "Find a Place to Die" above most Italo oaters: The group Lisa (Petit) compiles consists of a few interesting people, including an ex-con turned minister who seems to be sincere but is dubious at the same time. Secondly, their ordeal becomes almost a survival situation and I favor survival flicks. Thirdly, the story arc of the disgraced ex-Confederate (Hunter) is almost inspiring. Lisa says she's naturally drawn to him because she knows he's not like the other worthless cutthroats. The warmth of love slowly wakens the laconic loner out of his brooding stupor and draws the best in him out. Love is power and, when you find it, you need to plug into it if you want to live. Only a fool rejects it or, worse, abuses it. Lastly, being shot in Italy at some kind of ancient ruins, particularly the notable building of the cantina, the movie has a unique look for a Pasta Western, which of course were typically shot in Spain. The movie is lean at 89 minutes. GRADE: B

This is not a bad Spaghetti Western, marking one of Jeffrey Hunter's last roles: he's a discharged Army officer, slumming it in Mexico trading guns destined to a notorious band of cut-throats, who sees an opportunity to better his prospects when New Orleans belle Pascale Petit turns up with an offer of gold for the man who'll help save her husband (trapped in a mine cave-in, thus making the film something of a GARDEN OF EVIL [1954] rehash).Hunter assembles a motley group for the job, which is soon at each other's throat over both the promise of gold and the shapely lady herself!; one of them even joins the bandits – and usurps their leadership to boot! Also involved is Mexican prostitute Daniela Giordano (who mimics the melancholy title tune – the score for the film, by Gianni Ferrio, is another good one): the stunning-looking actress was a former "Miss Italy" contest winner, whose best opportunity came with her starring role in Mario Bava's FOUR TIMES THAT NIGHT (1969) – which, incidentally, also featured Petit. Her pimp (the first time I've heard a man being referred as such in a Western!) is one of Hunter's associates, who ultimately turns out to be a good guy. Not so a lecherous and sadistic doctor-cum-priest (Alfredo Lastretti), who's not even trusted by the traitorous and power-hungry group member when he tries to join his ranks! The gray-haired Hunter is pretty good in what he has to do (his short-term career didn't fulfill its initial promise); the action here – supervised by B-movie specialist Hugo Fregonese – is certainly competently handled, and the film itself seems to me to be an under-appreciated entry (I, for one, hadn't heard of it before) in this popular genre...

I was not sure at first, but I hate this movie. It looks like it was a drag, and even the music sounds forced. Everyone looks sweaty, hot, and like their costumes don't fit them very well. Jeffery Hunter appears OLD, fat and tired. He looks as desperate and at the end of his rope as his character was supposed to be, but I don't think it's an act. For one or two scenes the film sort of springs into motion, and it has some nice use of location and architecture (the shot of that large, squarish building in the background of a couple of scenes is impressive).But the film does not have the spunky cartoonish zest of a traditional Giuliano Carmineo film. I've acquired it as a widescreen print that Diamond Ent. appropriated from VCI when their DVD went Out of Print. It looks as though VCI's people attempted a digital enhancement to re-color an old, intact but color rotted print, and the result is this bizarre palette shift in places where everyone's face is beet red, rocks are orange and the skies are green. It has a Cowboy Movie mentality where guys pop up from behind rocks, squeeze off a shot, duck, pop back up, then pretend to be shot by throwing their arms up in the air and dramatically spinning around before flopping on the ground. Yawn.The frame compositions are interesting, the female leads are attractive and I like the ambiguous character who turns out to be the villain at the end. But I don't know. Jeff Hunter keeps getting his ass kicked, and doesn't really have any specialized skills that I can see which would set him apart from just another lout with a Winchester and an ax to grind. He looks uncomfortable in the role, either like he felt that the material was beneath him, or his pants were too tight. And don't get me started on that shirt he is wearing: Were they trying to make him look washed up & about to die of some horrible terminal disease? He sort of waddles around rather than sauntering like a Clint, Gianni Garko or even a John Phillip Law. Perhaps that is the point -- To humanize the Gringo, ala MINNESOTA CLAY, rather than having a cartoon character like Eastwood's Joe or Garko's Sartana.The problem is that like Sergio Corbucci's MINNESOTA CLAY, the movie simply SUCKS. It's a slog: I've watched it three times in vain attempts to find something about the film that I genuinely enjoy, and all I get is that big, square building in the background of a couple shots. It is an intriguing structure that looks so huge I wonder what it was really built for, where it is, and if it's still standing today. Gives you something better to think about than the movie anyway, and Carmineo cleaned up his routine by the time he inherited the Sartana legacy and made some wonderful films right through 1988's RATMAN. He had a nice comic book touch, and his movies are usually more interesting & fun than they had to be.But this isn't one of them, and whatever camp fun factor is to be had by watching a former Captain of the USS Enterprise in a Pasghetti Western is quickly blown clear by the first sight of Jeff Hunter in his little shirt there, pot belly pushing at the fabric and sweat popping out on his face with effort from being constrained by such tight pants. Just awful.