Waste of time

Overrated and overhyped

Good start, but then it gets ruined

A movie that not only functions as a solid scarefest but a razor-sharp satire.

If you were looking for a generic horror movie this is it. I would like to call BS on most of the deaths. I say that because even a modestly aware person would notice a potential threat coming. ******spoiler**** I reference the snowman death, are you telling me that a killer is able to sneak up on the character coming from the person's front? One may cite blocked line of sight, but really, its like if a killer was fat and trying to hide behind a twig. Another ***spoiler*** clichés like watch alarm going off randomly when hiding from said killer is very lame. One last bull crap that urked me was when one character, sees their friend get killed, runs out of the house... then stops may 30 feet from the house to take a breather...I say I am a horror junkie and some films are going to be subpar, but I would think that directors would try to be smart about it.

Are you tired of all the fake reviews? You just know it's the director, or one of those terrible actors sitting behind their computer screens, writing whatever it takes to get you to watch their truly awful horror films, right? Do not fear, Krackoon is here - and I trash on, well, just about everything.So, what about 'Dismembering Christmas?' Well, after the credits started to roll, I wanted to disremember ever seeing it. You can pretty much guess what you're in for, when you read the phrase 'a group of friends,' because you know there's going to be a cabin, and a person wearing a really cheap mask, right around the corner. So, if you want your halls decked with bad acting, horrible sound/music, poorly written dialogue, then 'Dismembering Christmas' is as good as the director, who wrote the fake review, says it is. The dialogue here is about as robotic as I've seen in a while - 'Sam.. we.. have.. to.. get.. out.. of.. here' These people make Robocop seem like your average every day guy.The acting is about three notches below bad - The 'Joan' character just paves the way for how bad it's going to get. I must apologize here, because when 'Joan' first made her appearance, I thought the character was actually played by a male dressed in drag. It wasn't until I loaded up IMDb, that I found out the part is actually played by Marla Van Lanen, whom I assume is actually a female. Sorry, Marla. It was an honest mistake.Random Ramblings of a Madman: Fake reviews aren't going to go away, but let's be honest here - If you thought a movie called 'Dismembering Christmas,' was going to be anything but bad - who is really to blame?

I have been so excited about this movie coming out, so to my excitement I get to watch and review this movie before it comes on DVD where I will also be buying the DVD. I love supporting independent films, and aspiring filmmakers and their cast and crew. Dismembering Christmas lived up to all my expectations and more.This film was directed by Austin Bosley who is known for survival Of The Dumbest as acting, director and writer. Written by Kevin Sommerfield and Steve Goltz. Kevin who I have got to know through him on facebook and researching him on the internet, I know that he is inspired by Wes Craven and his horror films, he loves 80s slashers, owning up to 5000 (?) DVDs. I know that Dismembering Christmas is set as a 80s slasher. If you are comparing Dismembering Christmas to Scream or Wes Cravens other slasher horrors I would say its up to same standards and considering Dismembering Christmas is a low budget, independent horror. Its high class indeed. Steve Goltz the other writer, he and Kevin are both involved in the same horror films Teddy and Popularity Killer. Teddy was the first "Entry Into Terror" (as quoted on IMDb). Again Steve was also inspired by by the horror sub-genre slashers, being Friday The 13th and I know What You Did Last Summer. Lets hope there will be a lot more horrors from them both. The cast includes Nina Kova, Leah Wiseman, Danielle Doetsch, Johnathon Krautkramer, (who was also in Don't Go To The Reunion) Shannon McInnis, Jennifer Lenius, Austin Bosley, Scott Seagren and Marla Van Lanen. Most of these actors are new to the acting scene (Less than 5 years). With Marla, Leah and Danielle being in many horror films and earning the rights to be on my Wall Of Horrors. When I started watching this film I noticed was the sound tracks. There was a lot of music depending on how the film went. It was brilliant. The music fitted very well with the film, characters and everything that was happening. Also the start where "Slasher Studios" came on screen and the sound effects there, it amused me. I haven't seen many Christmas horror films but it felt very 80s style when I compared it with other cabins/houses in the middle of no where and the mysterious happenings. Im loving how there are no cliques, no blond bimbos who run up the stairs with a banana instead of out the door with a knife or something. I noticed they all meshed well together as "friends and family". You can tell which ones are family too, there is a way they look, and mess around together that makes it perfect because this is how me and my sister talk to each other and messes around. The best part (which is the thing that I have to stop myself giving away), is the creativity of the murder weapons and how they are used. This movie is only just over 70 minutes long, there could have been a lot more action to make it go longer. But nonetheless I enjoyed this film very much and will watch many more times. Overall it was amazing, if you like fast paced, intense and creative Christmas horror I recommend this one you will NOT be disappointed.

Dismembering Christmas is in my opinion Slasher Studios best project. Although I am a fan of their previous work I think this film goes above and beyond anything they have done before. The film is just overall a lot sharper looking and is very well filmed. Austin Bosley does an amazing job directing this. It was nice to see Steve Goltz return with a writing credit to this film along side Slasher Studios co- creator Kevin Sommerfield. The film was delightfully awesome! The tone was a lot more present in this film and although there was less gore than previous SS features, when there was gore it was done extremely well. The cast done fantastically. Lead by Nina Cova and Leah Wiseman and with a few Slasher Studios Favourites thrown in for the fans this film will go down as Slasher Studios break through film. Although Don't Go To The Reunion was a personal favourite of mine I feel on the wider scale of thinsg this will will be the studios break out hit!