Wonderful Movie

Too much of everything

Excellent film with a gripping story!

Don't Believe the Hype

(57%) A very 1980's mid-budget sci-fi actioner featuring the very lovely Heather Thomas in a role that sees her take on criminal Martin Landau using her boyfriend's (Jeffrey Combs) super high-tec motorbike equipped with a laser-beam armed helmet and some rockets. And that's it for story. But this is still an enjoyable watch as the pacing is brisk and there aren't many fun action movies like this with a female lead. There are some quite cool and well handled moments, and the action is never below normal decent standards. Anyone in the mood for some long forgotten, yet still very watchable entertainment from the 1980's should give this a go.

Cyclone is the tale of a radically awesome motorcycle and the people that want to get their hands on its secret energy source. Jeffrey Combs plays Rick Davenport, a nerdy, scientific type who has developed the multi-million dollar "Cyclone", and even its helmet, which shoots lasers. For some reason, this dork's girlfriend is Heather Thomas, who's the hottest thing on two legs. When evildoers kill Rick (not a spoiler because it happens so early on in the film), it's up to Teri Marshall (Thomas) - presumably no relation to Joe "Samurai" Marshall of Samurai Cop infamy - to protect the "clean energy" source. Everyone wants this thing, and there's a conspiracy that goes all the way to the top - the big boss causing all the conflict is one Bosarian (Landau), the man sending out all the goons. Will Teri ride off into the sunset on the Cyclone? Director Fred Olen Ray assembled a major cast for this one - besides the aforementioned Thomas, Combs and Landau, we also have Martine Beswicke as a police chief, Troy Donahue as Rick's old contact, and they even dug up the legendary Huntz Hall, whose extensive career goes back to the thirties. Tim Conway, Jr. and Michael Reagan are teamed up as two of the dumbest cops in movie history. I wonder what their fathers would have thought. Bruce Fairbairn is on hand as Lt. Cutter, while Dawn Wildsmith plays one of the female baddies.A standout scene occurs when Rick and Teri pay a visit to the Lava Club to see a band called Haunted Garage. A lot of funny dancing is seen, as well as Teri's memorable outfit. The band doesn't seem that talented musically, but they are able to crank out their signature tune, "Devil Metal" with aplomb and it will be stuck in your head for days. Speaking of the music, Joe Pizzolo provides the moody anthem "Are You Too Tough" as well as the memorable "Riding on the Edge of Night", which provides the soundtrack for Teri riding the Cyclone down the streets of L.A. This guy could easily be the next Robert Tepper.Because some of the themes in the movie revolve around clean energy and leaked information, Cyclone seems pretty ahead of its time. But really, it's just comic-booky good fun and not meant to be taken all that seriously. It appears fairly tongue-in-cheek in the classic Fred Olen Ray way. Thomas carries the movie on her looks alone, but she is amply supported by an army of B-movie names in this somewhat fluffy outing.It ends with some impressive stunts and explosions, after the prerequisite chase scenes. I think there's even a "NOoooooo!" somewhere in the mix, but the beeps and lasers coming from the soundtrack/Cyclone are pretty distracting.Lastly, the film is dedicated to Dar Robinson, the legendary stuntman and actor. His final acting role was as Rolf in this film.For the cast and to see Heather Thomas, Cyclone is worth it. Also helmet lasers.For more insanity, please visit: comeuppancereviews.com

Rarely does one find a movie so bad that it achieves the often-sought paradigm of having so little redeeming value that that alone makes it worth watching. "Cyclone," I am happy to report, is such a film.I knew I was in for something good as soon as I found the videotape. I am at least its fourth owner: It has a "Used Movie Sale! $9.95" sticker on the front, and a yard-sale sticker for one dollar. I picked it up at a thrift store for fifty cents.The Used Movie Sale! sticker covers much of the front cover artwork, meaning that what I see is a truly odd blended still of the front of the Cyclone super bike, a car flipping over on fire, and Heather Thomas, wearing Flouncy Eighties Hair with her mouth open in an expression that says, "I 'ave a 'ooth ache." I saw that and thought, "All RIGHT." The case, honestly, was enough ("with nowhere to turn and no one to trust, Teri is plunged headlong into a maze of danger and deceit"), but I surprised myself by actually getting around to watching it. I always make time for the really bad films. That "Fight Club" tape can wait.Meet Teri. Teri is a stunningly well-crafted character, as we can tell from her introduction, in which she and her friend do exercises that highlight her breasts and, later, her legwarmers. Then Teri goes off to hook up with her boyfriend for the evening that goes horribly wrong. Before she knows it, Teri is driven "straight into a web of deadly double-crosses in CYCLONE." The VHS box tells it like it is.Left out of the box summary - perhaps out of some faint hope that actual copies of this film would be sold - is how awful the acting is. It might have been just me, but I kept thinking I could read the characters' thoughts through their eyes. "This is dumb," thinks Heather Thomas. "I know," thinks Bad Guy with Too-Wide Mouth.A driving force (no pun intended) for the second half of this epic picture are the car chases. Those were actually pretty good, although I'm inclined that gasoline doesn't need coaching on how to explode. What really impressed me is that, in all the chases, the streets were pretty much empty. It's like there are only twenty people in this huge city.I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, "Gee Wilikers! I have to see this movie!" The sad thing, though, is that you can't find it. Oh no. "Cyclone" is a film that finds YOU. Just wait. Some day - perhaps during lunch, perhaps late in the evening, perhaps "when military scientist Jeffery Combs ('Re-Animator')is murdered by hired assassins" - you will hear the rustle of legwarmers, and know that it is time.

Although I am a fan of Heather Thomas and I have a few of her old bikini posters around here somewhere, I can honestly say that if the only movie I had ever seen her in was "Cyclone", I would never be able to guess why she had made it as far as she had in show business.Directed by Fred Olen Ray (about as good an omen as seeing buzzards circle over head in the desert), this tale of a woman (Thomas) who must protect a high-tech motorcycle from unscrupulous types is about as "B" movie as it gets (or in Fred Olen's case, "B minus").The cast itself should tell you something. It's not every movie that combines Thomas with actors the calibre of Beswick, Hall, Combs, Donahue, Tamblyn and Landau (!!). If you're lucky, very few movies do. And even though they seem to be having fun, shouldn't some of that fun be passed on to the audience? I vote yes, seems they voted no.Of course, if you ever wanted to see Heather deliver an uppercut to another woman, use the "F" word and get hooked up to battery cables, you've probably been looking for this one. Myself, I'll be content with old "Fall Guy" reruns.One star, given in hopes that when another "Cyclone" hits town, Heather runs for shelter. I know I will.