This is How Movies Should Be Made

Horrible, fascist and poorly acted

It's a movie as timely as it is provocative and amazingly, for much of its running time, it is weirdly funny.

Mostly, the movie is committed to the value of a good time.

This movie is a cartoon told with real actors! Which makes it a true joy to watch ..... and the laffs are plenty!The Burlesque Assassins are an underground special agent troupe of high end strippers who's mission is to assassinate the clones of Hitler, Stalin, and Moussolini. This in itself is enough to get you to watch this wacky story. But there's more!Their boss Johnny Valentine must dress incognito, and one of the strippers is a novice at espionage! She must learn on the job!If the story is too wack for you then watch it for the classic burli'q stripping - they do a great job!

Exactly what this bizarre film is, or attempts to be, is hard to say. Amateurish and inept beyond description, it has the feel of not exactly a very bad high school play, but more like the first rehearsal for a very bad high school play. But then about half way through the unremittingly cartoonish awfulness of it all I got the sense of a hidden subtext much like when watching a sneakily religious or political movie. It was only when I saw the credits that I figured it out, I think. This was apparently made by a group of Canadian Burlesque aficionados. Who knew there was such a thing? Only the Burlesque dancing itself (G rated nippleless striptease) is given any serious attention at all. The girls are indeed beautiful and skilled, they each did their own remarkable choreography, and everything else on the screen just didn't matter to the filmmakers. And I guess doesn't matter, after all, to me. I wish they had made a frank and personal documentary about themselves instead of such a witless farce, I would be quite interested to know the talented real women dancers behind all this muddle, but hey kids, dance on, strip on and have fun. Just don't call it anything like a real movie.

could not even manage 5 mins, been on IMDb for a long time an only after viewing this i have felt compelled to make a statement, i may be on my own here but i have watched some drivel, and to the end, but this? please , director/producer, have a little respect for the audience to torment with this. i have to make 10 lines to put this review on here and can think of nothing more to say, so here is some waffle, how does a film like this get released? surely the budget guy must be wetting his pants thinking this movie could claw some of the budget back. please, take it away, re-shoot and re-edit it so us generic public can enjoy what is, in a positive sense, a good storyline.

This movie is a mix of Charlie's Angels meets the burlesque world as these trained assassins join forces to fight the evil doers of War World II. The cinematography is incredible and this break out film for director Jonathan Joffe is top notch. It mixes sexy ladies, comedy, and a believable tale into a light hearted look into a simpler time when the good guys were good and the bad were bad. From the vintage cars, close, and buxom beauties, Burlesque Assassins is a class act. I saw it as part of the Southern Fried Burlesque festival in Atlanta Georgia and was the perfect kick off for a first class showcase of the best that burlesque has to offer.