Undescribable Perfection

Such a frustrating disappointment

The film creates a perfect balance between action and depth of basic needs, in the midst of an infertile atmosphere.

The film never slows down or bores, plunging from one harrowing sequence to the next.

I just loss 83 mins of my life.. 83 mins I could have done something worth while like, cutting grass, sleeping, cleaning the house... This was a waste of time, and I hope to never ever watch this again for the rest of my life. The director should never work on a film ever again. He tried to be witty but failed at every step. There was nothing at all good to say about this film. I thought Simon Amestell was a cross dresser or Pre Op transvestite till I looked him up on Wikipedia... I even hated this film the second time I watched it. an outter waste of time and film, why was it even made, does anyone like this shitty ass movie? i don't know a single person thats even seen it let alone like it.

Black Pond is not normal. It is odd. It is patchy. It is padded-out with an unnecessary but not unamusing performance from Simon Amstell. It is sometimes confusing and incoherent. It is also hilarious and memorable and brilliantly-performed. Chris Langham (yes, that Chris Langham) is on top form: "It's sheer lunacy to eat a banana at this time of night." There are so many great bits: the "I love you - both of you" in the car. The "phenomenal tw*t" line. Don't miss it. It's excellent. Yes, it feels overlong and underdone, somehow - it might have been better as a short, but even so, there is more imagination and wit on display than in most "quality" movies that stink up the multiplex on a regular basis.

Creepy, uncomfortable, cheap, and actually lacking imagination. It is very confusing when watching the film without the aid of a preview, one doesn't quite understand if it has a serious intent or is just a spoof. The conclusion is quickly that it's a bad spoof. Dysfunctional family, weird outsider, dodgy dog. A dog's dinner. In fact the three legged dog was the best actor. There is a real danger of one being trapped into thinking it's good because it's alternative and built on a £25k budget. It's only just above awful because my compatriots giggled and didn't dump the DVD. but only just. Unfortunately one laughs for all the wrong reasons. Deeply depressing..I lost my sense of humour in the black pond.

An incredibly impressive debut film from youthful newcomers Will Sharpe and Tom Kingsley. Black Pond is a delightfully grim black comedy about the Thompson family, who're embroiled in a tabloid scandal about the death of a new family friend. They say that truth is stranger than fiction and, while this IS fictional, it has a realistic plausibility and a documentary style which makes the almost farcical events seem hilariously absurd in contrast with the repressed sobriety of the upper-middle-class English milieu. It's one of these films that will have you grinning like a Cheshire cat all the way through, giggling and snorting like a child who's just heard an old man fart during a quiet church service and eventually letting out a proper belly-laugh every now and then. Colin Hurley, Amanda Hadingue, Simon Amstell, Will Sharpe (writer/director/actor) and the whole cast are excellent and Chris Langham makes a long-awaited return to film (with the controversy of his own personal ordeal with negative publicity perhaps adding its own somewhat dark undertone to the film – almost definitely NOT a conscious effort by the producers though!). It's a fine example of typically British satirical wit and exemplary of the potential of indie cinema, considering it was made on tiny budget of £25,000. The lack of money means this film will only be seen by few people on its limited release, but as it gathers rave reviews and serious respect, it will no doubt earn cult status by the time it's out on DVD. More like this and more from Sharpe and Kingsley please!